Red vs Blue vs Naruto
by Bravo 1
Summary: Naruto and the gang have somehow aravid in Blood Gultch. They must work with the Red and the Blues to get back home. Rated M for saftey reason. Couples NH, SS, CT
1. Chapter 1

I don't own Naruto or Red vs. Blue

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter one

"Ouch. My head, what happen? Hey where are we? Sasuke; HEY Sasuke wake up. "

"What happen? Hey Naruto where are we?"

"How should I know?" Looking at the area there was nothing grass and small hills surrounded large canyon wall. "What the hell is this place? Hey Hinata what about… HEY WAIT WHERE HINATA AND SAKURA!"

(Gun coking)

"Hey Dirt bag get up NOW!"

"Gees Simmons Sarge is rubbing off on you." The soldier said in a sarcastic tone.

"Yup he even might reward me like promotion."

"Promotion common Simons not that again, and beside that was sarcasm."

"Oh no not sarcasm (pfft) Griff sometimes I think you don't even care about having a better position in the military."

"Care ha what the point you're still going to die; besides we will be in this stupid box canyon until we all die."

While Simons and Griff argue with each other Naruto and Sasuke decided to leave the area.

"…and another thing hey where did those two go?" said Simons

"What? Oh damn looks like we lost them lets go back to base and do nothing all day." Said Griff

"Griff did you forget about what Sarge said if we don't bring a dead Blue guy he going to kill us." Said Simmons

"Yeah I remember that's why I'm going to stay here for the rest of the war." Said Griff

"Griff this war could last forever and beside how are you goanna survive."

"Do you remember my zombie plan? Well that's my plan."

"Man do they love to talk over there." Said Naruto

"Naruto we need to find the girls lets go scout the area."

"Right lets…"

"Hello boys look like it's my lucky day." Said a man in red armor,

Naruto and Sasuke jumped to their feet ready to fight.

"Let's do this Naruto!"

"Right, Rasengan."

"Chidori."

Nothing happen their chakra flow stop they couldn't their jutsu.

"What the HELL why can't I realize my chakra." Said Naruto

"Naruto forget about chakra lets attack." Said Sasuke

They charge at the man in red armor but were shot at in stead and passed out.

Naruto was shot at the arm and his right arm blew off, and also damaged his left side of his face and same goes for Sasuke but his left leg blew off and his right lower arm blew off.

"Hey Sarge what happen." Said man in pink armor

"Dounut make ready for surgery we need to save these fellows from the gruesome hands of death." Said red armor man

"Got it Sarge, wonder where's Simmons and Griff?" said Dounut

"Hmm, looks like we need to give you new clothing SIMMONS, GRIFF WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU." Said Sarge

"Right here sir, what is thy command."

"What, now your being all Darth Vader like, Simmons I swear you're just like a retarded servant monkey."

"Hey shut up Griff I'm just doing my job."

"Job! What job all we do is standing around and do absolutely nothing."

"Hey Ladies Will you just shut up and help Dounut with these two." Said Sarge

"Yes sir." Said Simmons and Griff

On the other side of the box canyon.

"Ow, what happen where are…Hinata get are you alright." Said Sakura

"Yeah I'm alright… but where's Naruto and Sasuke?"

"WHAT? SASUKE! What happen I don't remember what happen?"

"Hey you're awake Church, CHURCH the pink hair one is awake and the black hair one is too." Said a man in blue armor

"Caboose quiet down man. Hey their how are you guys?" said Church

"Yes were okay thank you. But have you seen two others one having black hair and the other having blonde hair." Said Sakura

"No, but why would you girls want them when you can have me. Tucker the love doctor." Said Tucker

"Tucker shut the fuck up. You know you're more of a pervert before you had Jr. you know that."

"Hey ever since I had Jr. my Hormones are raging like crazy."

"Um were you just pregnant." Said Hinata

"Well he wasn't pregnant he just had an alien baby inside him. Okay he was pregnant." Said Church

"Okay but how a man can become pregnant." Said Sakura

"I have no idea but I really don't want to know." Said Church

"Church tell them how the alien daddy got to second with Tucker." Said Caboose

"CABOOOSE!"

End of chapter one


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own Naruto or Red vs. Blue

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter two

Five hours later

Naruto and Sasuke were lying on the ground.

"Oww my head and my arm. What happen; one minute I and Sasuke attacked some guy in crazy red armor and then…" Then he notices his arm all mechanical. "Wha…wha…what happen to my arm?" He turned his head to a mirror and he notice his face was like his arm. His face was all machines like and his eye was glowing red. He started to panic and stated to scream.

"Naruto; what the hell? Why are you screa…ming? Na…NARUTO WHAT HAPPEN TO YOUR FACE AND ARM." Said Sasuek

"How should I know? One minute I woke up and I saw myself like this and … Sasuke look at your arm and your leg." Said Naruto

"Wha! My arm… and my leg… what the HELL HAPPEN TO US!?" said Sasuke

"Hey what you dirt bags screaming about?" Said Sarge

"YOU WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO US!?" Shouted Naruto

"Well I shot you with my shot gun here and both of you were close to death. So either A. I would have leave you outside to die or B. Help you and fix you up or C. wait when you guys are dead and get Simmons and Griff to stuff you guys and make you guys trophies.

"That's just sick you know that." Said Sasuke

"Hey Sarge we got… hey you guys are awake. How are you doing?" said Simons

"Hey Simmons why are you taking so long? Whoa it's you guys." Said Griff "Hey..don't..be..afraid..you..guys..are..in..the..future."

"Griff their not stupid they just need to get used to their new limbs. Beside do you remember how you got new limbs and organs?" Said Simmons

"No because I have your organs and what not. Beside you're a cyborg Simmons how do you got used to of being a cyborg." said Griff

"Well first it's wasn't all that bad…" said Simmons

"Hey it isn't all that bad." Said Naruto while he was getting up from the ground.

"Next I felt faster and stronger…"

"Yeah it's not all that bad and I do feel more powerful." Said Sasuke he too got up.

"Then I feel depressed…"

"Damn!" said Naruto

"After that I had a very painful erection…"

"Oh God." Said Sasuke; falling to the ground holding his erection.

"But then I felt like I want to kill someone…"

"I'm going to kill you Naruto!"

"Not if I kill you first Sasuke."

"Finally I threw up."

Naruto and Sasuke throwing up in the background.

"Simmons, Griff stop talking and get the uniforms for these two knuckleheads." Ordered Sarge

"Why these two aren't part the Red Army." Said Griff

"Because I heard from command that the Blue's just got reinforcements at the same time these two came along." Said Sarge

"Wait these reinforcements did they say anything else about them?" said Naruto

"What!? Do you know these Blues because if you do then I have the right to shoot one sight." Shouted Sarge

"Um, well two of our companies are missing and we think that they might be with the Blues." Said Naruto

"Hmm, so they are red spies are they?"

" Umm, no heck we don't know where our companions are at right now."

"So it settles then these two are spies from the Blue Army."

"What!? Were not part of the Blue Army!" shouted Sasuke.

"Then why are you hear?" said Simmons

"How should we know one minute we woke up here next you two point a gun at us then we got shot by the madman their…"Shouted Naruto

"Haha they called you a madman Sarge." Said Griff

"Shut it Dirt Bag or I'll make you run a hundred laps."

"Yes sir." Said Griff

"Now we see that my arm is missing and is replaced by this thing and my eye and my eye lids are missing. Sasuke leg is gone and half of his arm is missing as well." Shouted Naruto

"What's your point anyway… umm what your name son?" said Sarge

"Damn it, MY NAME IS NARUTO UZAMAKI AND THIS SASUKE UCHIHA! GOT IT OLD MAN!" once more Naruto shouted

"Old man, OLD MAN, did you just called me AN OLD MAN YOU PIECE OF TERD!"

"Oh boy here we go again." (sigh)Griff said

Back at Blue Base

Hinata and Sakura were sitting down on their knees while Church was standing up explaining about their situation.

"Alright girls I went to Blue Command and found nothing about you two or anything about your friends. But we did found out about two newbie's at Red Base so I'm guessing they might be them. But for now I want you two to blend in, is that okay?" Said Church

"Sure no problem." Said Sakura

"Umm Church umm…" Said Hinata

"What is it Hinata?" questioned Church

"Well we don't know nothing about what's going on about now and why you guy's are fighting the red Army." Said Hinata

"Well the truth is I have no idea my self either."

"Church, Church, Chuuuurch."

"Urgh, what is it Caboose?"

"The Rubber duck came back, he won't leave me alone."

"Oh for the love of, Caboose the rubber duck won't hurt you, it just a fucking rubber duck alright." Said Church

"But what if…"

"CABOOSE SHUT UP!"

"Okay I'll go and talk to O'Malley in my head. **I SHALL KILL AAAAAALLLLLLLLLL BWAHAHAHAHAHA."**

"Shit, excuse me girls I need to deal with this. Come hear you little son of a…"

"…Okay what just happen?" said Sakura

"These soldiers aren't very normal at all. They must have staid here for a very long time." Said Hinata

Tex came in the room where the girls were at looking for Church.

"Church, Church, CHUR… What the HELL, MORE GIRLS, for the love of. Hey Tucker come over here NOW."

Red Base Five Hours Later

Sarge, Naruto and Sasuke were fighting and bickering until they just give up and the guys put on their new uniforms.

"Hey this uniforms is actually every comfortable and easy to move." Said Naruto

"Yeah and I can jump higher with out using chakra."

Naruto's Uniform was red orange and he wields a battle rifle.

Sasuke's armor was dark red and he wields sniper rifle.

"Alright dirt bags I have a mission for you I want you two and Griff to go to Blue Base and get rid of the new blues."

"But should we learn more about our enemy's."

"Why even bother he always sends me to do something that evolves in killing me." Said Griff

"So he wants us to… die, is that what he wants." Said Sasuke

"Yup that's basically what he wants us to do." Said Griff

"So Get Going now Dirt Bags" Said Sarge

End of Chapter 2


	3. Chapter 3

I don't own Naruto or Red vs. Blue

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter three

"Tucker, TUCKER, damn him! Where the FUCK is he" said Tex

Back with Church

"Hey Caboose where are you? All I'm going to do is rip O'Malley out your head."

"Hey Church great news O'Malley is out of my head, yes. And my legs hurt a lot." Caboose fell to the ground and fainted.

"Ah shit! Now where did he go:"

Red base

"Hey Sarge Command send us another suit." Said Donut. The color of the suit is dark slate gray and it was holding a magnum gun

"What? We don't need another suit, unless they want me to make another robot like Lopez and removing Griff's brain and put it this machine then send it to Blue Base with nuke in its stomach and blow it up. Or maybe…" said Sarge

"Oh, oh, oh maybe it's anew suit for Me."

"Why the hell do you need a new suit you already have a suit. So what's the point of having another suit?"

"Because… um, I want another suit that's why."

Back with Griff and the others

"Okay this is the Blue base the leader is Church he has a Cobalt armor. The other is Tucker he has Cyan armor. Next we have Caboose he is the dumbest person is the entire universe he has Blue armor. The yellow armor is my sister…"

"Why your sister is in the blue army, or why are you in the red army?"

"She's color blind oh by the way if you kill her I'll kill you alright." Naruto and Sasuke nodded with agreement. "Okay, the blues have a tank and freelancer. So if you see a tank coming at you yell at me first so I can run away while you guys distract the tank and maybe just maybe survive."

"What the HELL?" said Sasuke

"But their freelancer is a bitch. One time she was posses by an advance AI but it only made her a more evil bitch." Said Griff

"So when do we attack Griff?" said Naruto

"We, what this we stuff? I'm not going down there you guys are."

"WHAT?!" said both Nin

"Yeah so go down there and attack."

"Fuck you Griff." Said Naruto and started to go to the Blue base.

Back at red base

"So what do we do with the extra suit Sarge." Said Simmons

"Throw it out we don't need another suit of armor." Said Sarge

"Right Sarge."

"But Sarge…" said Donut

Simmons threw it out the extra suit of armor at the back of the base.

"Alright men since Griff and the new guys are at their we need to move out now." Said Sarge

"But how Sarge, how do we attack them they have a tank and that crazy freelancer." Said Simmons

"Simple I send Griff and the others to attack Blue base to distract them next all four us…"

"Four of us, but Sarge there's only three of us." Said Simmons

"Not any more men meet the new and improved Lopez."

"Hola yo soy Lopez dos punto cero. Y yo odio los azules." Said Lopes 2.0

Back at blue base

"Alright new girls since I probably know where Tucker is and I don't want my mind to scared just tell me who the hell are you?" said Tex

"Um… my name is Hinata and this is Sakura."

"Hinata? Sakura? Are you guys Japanese."

"No were from the Land of Fire, Village hidden in the Leafs." Said Sakura

"Okay, never heard that before. Alright girlfriends lets get this straight if you ever become more popular than me or if you ever make Church like you more than me I will make you suffer. GOT IT!"

The girls nodded with fear but then Sakura notice something.

"Hey wait a minute do you like Church?" said Sakura

"What me like Church… I don't know what you are talking about. Shut up."

Sakura and Hinata started to giggle. "You do like Church" said in union

"I…I… I'm going to find Tucker you two stay here… bitches."

Back with Naruto and Sasuke

"Alright were only fifty feet away from the base; now what?" Said Naruto

"I don't know we don't know how these guys tactics" Said Sasuke

"Hey what the hell are you guys doing? Go and attack the Blue Base." Said Griff

"Okay genius tells us how to do that?" said Naruto

"Damn fine Naruto charge and attack the Blue Base and you Sasuke covering fire use you sniper gun from a distance. The position your at is fine. Just attack dumb asses!" said Griff

"Fine let's go Naruto." Said Sasuke

"Right attack." said Naruto

Back at Red Base

"Lets go Ladies we need to hurry." Said Sarge

"Were all ready Sarge." Said Simmons"

When they left the extra suit started to activate.

"Finally I have my own body now I will destroy the universe." Said O'Malley


	4. Chapter 4

I don't own Naruto and Red vs. Blue

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 4

At Blue Base

"I don't like Church he's a bastard…yeah that's what he's a bastard." Said Tex

"Hey Tex I need to talk to you." Said Church

"What CHURCH." She turned around not making eye contact at him.

"What Tex are you alright. Never mind we got a problem." Said Church

"What is it Church?"

"Well O'Malley was in Caboose's mind and now he's gone. Do you know any way that the AI can go into another host without using radio contact?"

"Well there is another way." Tex turned around looking at Church. "If there is an empty suit of armor in a 50 miles radius then he could have posses it and control the body. But how long did this happen?" said Tex

"About an hour ago." Said Church

"Then the AI should have died about forty minutes ago." Said Tex

Doc came in the room panting like crazy.

"Hey… Church… damn… two… two extra suits just came here." Said Doc

"The new suits I ordered for the girls." Said Church

Back with Naruto and Sasuke

Naruto and Sasuke were on top of a hill ready to attack.

"Damn how do you use this stupid thing? Hey Griff how do you use this weapon."

"Oh sweet God in heaven if you love you'll kill me right now, just pull the trigger." Said Griff

"Oh found it."

"Ready Naruto." Said Sasuke

"Yeah I'm ready." Said Naruto

Naruto and Sasuke rush toward the Blue Base; Naruto wielding his assault riffle and Sasuke with his magnum pistol.

Meanwhile Tucker, Sister and Jr. were outside on top of a cliff watching everything

"Well Jr. and Sister looks like the red's are attacking us again." Said Tucker

"Honk" said Jr.

"Sweet more guys are coming, hot." Said Sister

"You do know one of them is your brother right."

"Ew! Tucker that's disgusting and also HOT."

"A-Okay, Church, come in Church this is Tucker."

Below the base

"So how do you guys feel in the new suit of armor?" Said Church

"It feels much better than the ANBU outfit." Said Sakura

"Yeah plus with our chakra gone we can run faster and jump higher with these suits." Said Hinata

Sakura's armor is green and Hinata's armor is white. Sakura and Hinata both wield assault rifle.

"Church, come in Church this is Tucker"

"Tucker what is it?"

"The reds are coming the reds are coming."

"The red's what the hell!? How many are out their." Said Church

"Two newbie's just coming at the Blue Base and… oh shit."

"What is it Tucker?"

"Sarge, Simmons, Donut, and… uh oh Lopez are coming in the War Hog."

"LOPEZ, Lopez is back, ah shit. Tucker try and hold off the reds."

"What I'm not a fighter I'm a lover."

"Just do it Tucker or I'll kill you myself."

"Alright."

"Tex go to Sheila and get rid of the War Hog; I'll try and give covering fire, you two stay here I'm guessing the two newbie's are your friends so if I was a red newbie and knowing Sarge tactics they'll probably the one's that are in the base."

"Right… wait how do you know our friends are here?" said Sakura

"I'll tell you later. Caboose where are." Said Church

"I'm Right here…" Caboose was out the base. "…and I'm okay, I'm okay." Then he fell to ground "I'm not okay." Said Caboose

"Great he fainted, Tex it's better for you to go to the back entrance."

"You know you're actually doing a great job running this situation."

"Um thanks I learn from the best." He looked at Tex and she just looked down and blushed.

"Thanks Church, that means a lot to me."

"What I'm not talking about you I'm talking about my self."

"Asshole."

"Bitch."

Tex went to the back exit. "Oh Tex…" Church still had his back to her. "...you becarful out there." Tex was facing toward the exit. "You too Church." She took off to Sheila.

Back with the reds

"Griff what are you doing here. Your suppose to help the newbie's with the attack at the Blue Base." Said Sarge

"Yeah but then I thought to my self, why get killed when I can live and make Sarge happy to see me." "Sarcastically"

"Argh, Girff you're making me angry and you wouldn't like me when I'm angry." Said Sarge

"Oh, what are you goanna do to me Sarge turn green and kill me." Said Griff

"No that's Lopez job."

"Wha!?"

Lopez run over to him and hit him on the head.

"Oww, that hurt."

"Now quit complaining Griff and get going you lazy dirt bag."

"Yes sir." Said Griff

At the Red Base

"Bwahahahahah, now that I have a body I need a vehicle to get out of Blood Gulch. Now where is that device ah here it's." O'Malley got on the ghost and started flying it into the sky. "Wait the reason that my last plans failed was because of that bitch Tex. I must get rid of her first. Then I can move on ruling the Universe. Bwahahahahahaha!"

End of chapter 4


	5. Chapter 5

I don't own Naruto or Red vs. Blue

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter five

"Oh crap here they come!" said Tucker

"Honk, blarg, honk" said Jr.

"Oh yeah lets go red. Ram the enemy with that jeep." Said Sister

"Um sister you're a blue not a red." Said Tucker

"Wait a minute Tucker, let's have SEX."

"…Okay, Jr. shoot the reds. Let's go sister."

"Actually Tucker I really don't want to have sex now."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

Back with the red's

"Alright men this what were goanna do first…" said Sarge. Then the War Hog blew up. But every one survived the explosion.

"Damn it's the crazy bitch sir." Said Simmons

"Men I think it's time for us to attack with bayonets. Arm bayonets." Said Sarge

"Sir how can we arm a bayonet when we don't even have bayonets." Said Griff

"Then plan b it is, we make the Griff Bayonet."

"Um sir what is the Griff Bayonet?" said Griff

"Simple it's you on a capitol. Donut make ready…"

"Sir I already made the capitol sir." Said Donut

"Good job Donut. Simmons put Griff on the capitol."

"Yes sir and by the way your plan is a wonderful plan." Said Simmons

"Kiss ass." Said Griff

Bam bam bam

"Sir the capitol blew up." Said Donut

"Okay I think it's time to…retreat" Said Sarge

"What sir?" said Donut

"RETREAT men except for you Griff we need you to distract the crazy bitch." Said Sarge

"What hell no, I'm not staying here" Said Griff

The reds retreated back to their base while Church ran up to Shelia.

"Alright Tex you corner them all need to do now is to invade their base and win.

Woooosh. A banshee came out of nowhere an started to attack Tex and Shelia

"Hey what that noise?" said Church

"Hahahah oblivion hahahaha."

"What the hell it's O'Malley!" said Church

"What the hell, O'Malley?!" said Tucker

"Tex blow him up hurry!" Said Church

"Oh shit!" Shouted Tex

But it was too late O'Malley blew the tank up.

"TEEEEX"

Sarge came of the safety of his base. "Men get rid of O'Malley."

The reds started to shoot O'Malley but he got away.

"Bwahahahahaaha now nothing can get in the way for my conquest of the Universe Hahahahaahaha." Said O'Malley

Church ran toward to the blown up tank

"TEX! TEEEEX!" said Church

"Chruch." Tex said weakly

Church started to remove the scrapes off of Tex.

"Tex…are you alright?"

"Chruch…chu…I wan't to tell you something."

"What is it Tex?"

"I lov… I love…" Those were Tex last words before she died. Church started to shake then he started to sob and he held her dead corpse in his arms.

"Gun cocks" "Church looked up and saw Sarge pointing his shot gun at him and Tex.

"Church get out of there RUN." Said Tucker but Church stood his ground while holding Tex in his arm.

"Damn it all…" Sarge dropped his gun down. "Donut make ready for surgery."

"What? But sir he's a Blue." Said Simmons

"Yeah Sarge he's a Blue and orders from command is to kill all Blues and do a better job than what we were doing. Man do they need to have better generals." Said Griff

"Shut up Griff. Donut Go back to base and make ready for surgery."

"Right sir."

"But why sir? Why help our enemy?" Questioned Simmons

"Because there is no honor what O'Malley just did and Church is acting like a pussy and I don't like that because it reminds me of you Griff." Said Sarge

"Oh gees thanks a lot Sarge." Said Griff

"Don't mention it Griff." Said Sarge

"Well I think it's a great idea to show mercy to our enemy Sarge." Said Simmons

"Thank you Simmons I hope this will help you on becoming a great leader. But not replacing me and bearing me in a grave, then falling down into a hole." Said Sarge

"Don't worry sir I won't and I think you'll be a great leader for many generation later." Said Simmons

"Hey Red's would just shut up and help me Tex." Said Church

"Sure thing Church; Simmons Griff go help Church with the Crazy Bitch I mean Tex." Said Sarge

"Yes sir, on it." Said Simmons

"Fine." Said Griff

Simmons and Griff helped Church with Tex carrying her to Red Base.

"Lopez, go tell the rookies to stop fighting and return to Red Base."

"Si senor." Said Lopez

Back at Blue base

Naruto and Sasuke were in front of the Blue Base. Sasuke threw a grenade into the base.

"Hey what's that? Uh oh." Said Caboose

Boooom!

"AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH what's was THAT!" Screamed Doc

"Sounds like an explosion." Said Sakura

"Maybe the Reds won the fight." Said Hinata

"Owww my head hurts a lot and the rubber duck is laughing at me." Said Caboose Naruto and Sasuke look at Caboose and notice that there is no rubber duck in sight.

"Well this was easy now what?" said Naruto

"Wait do you hear that?" Said Sasuke

"Sound like their in the basement. Let's take them." Said Naruto

Naruto and Sasuke were near the stairs to the basement and were shot at a couple of times.

"DAMN IT their attacking us. Hey you down stop attacking and we won't kill you." Said Naruto

"That voice. I know that voice." Said Hinata

She came out her hiding place and stood the firing range.

"Hinata what are you doing?" Said Sakura

Naruto looked at Hinata but didn't notice her because of the helmet and shot twice at her stomach and once at her leg. Hinata looked at Naruto weakly and slowly removed her helmet showing her self.

"Hin…Hinata." Said Naruto

"Nar…ru…to." Said Hinata

She fell to the ground and Naruto went to her side. Removing his helmet and showing his new makeover.

"Naruto wh…happen to your face,"

"Don't worry about that."

She touched his face. "Naruto I need to tell you something."

"What is it Hinata?"

"Naruto I love you Naruto."

"Hinata I love you to." Her hand fell down to the ground and she passed out due to blood loss. Naruto started to cry and held Hinata close to him.

While all this is happening Sakura saw in disbelief that Hinata was shot by Naruto. Sasuke also was surprised by the recent attack. Doc saw what just happen and came out of his delusion to help Hinata.

"Hey I can help I'm a doctor." Naruto looked at Doc while holding Hinata tighter.

"How can I trust you? You're a blue aren't?"

"No not really I'm neutral in this conflict so I'm also on your side and Hinata side."

"Naruto…he's telling the truth. You need to trust him." Said Sakura

Naruto made up his mind to let him help Hinata because she didn't had much time left. Out side of Blue base Lopez came running towards looking for the rookies.

"Sasuke, Naruto" Said Lopez

Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura were on the roof.

"Hey Naruto how are you doing?" said Sakura

"Horrible, I just shot the woman I love and she almost died." Said Naruto

"Naruto we got a problem." Said Sasuke

"What is it Sasuke." Lopez ran into the Blue base.

"Fuck I need to stop him." Naruto ran down stairs to stop the soldier.

"Sasuke what do we do now." Said Sakura

"I'll call Griff maybe he can help us if he's still not pissed at us. Griff come in Griff this Sasuke."

End of chapter five


	6. Chapter 6

I don't own Naruto or Red vs. Blue

One more thing

Speaking

_thinking_

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter six

During the time when Naruto was sulking about what he did to Hinata, Sasuke saw Lopez running towards the Blue Base. When he told the situation to Naruto, the blond red soldier ran over the ledge and jumped down the ground and followed Lopez in.

"HEY YOU! DON'T EVEN GO IN THERE." Naruto shouted at Lopez and he was only a few meters away from the basement where Hinata and Doc are at. "Tu eres Naruto o eres Sasuke?" (Are you Naruto or are you Sasuke?) Lopez Questioned "What the hell are you saying and how do you know my name and who the hell are you?" Naruto looked at Lopes carefully and notice a red emblem on his shoulders only red's has a red emblem but couldn't be seen because their armor is red. "Are you part of the Red Army?" "Si yo soy Lopez el pesado y yo odio azule."(Yes I am Lopes the heavy and I hate blues.) "Damn Hinata and Sakura are wearing Blue armor. Well their not wearing blue armor but hey do have a blue emblem on."

Later on

"Hey Simmons; how the hell does Sarge bring people back from the dead anyway?" Said Griff

"How should I know? All I know that when you were rammed by the tank he was able to bring you back." Said Simmons

"Well I you ask me this is against all of God divine plan." Said Griff

"Griff if God didn't want us to bring people back from the dead then he wouldn't gave us advance technology." Said Simmons

"Yeah maybe your right (sigh) oh well so much for the Grim Reaper looks like he's out of the job." Said Griff

"Yeah poor Grim Reaper I hope he gets a new job." Said Simmons

At McDonalds

"So do you want a soda with that miss?" said Grim

"Yes please."

"Okay that $4.50…" the lady gave her the money and accordantly touched his hand and fell down dead.

"Will that here or to…oh not again."

Back at red base

(Radio buzzing)

"Griff come in Griff this Sasuke!"

"What the Hell!? How the hell did you get this number rookie!?"

"Number? What num…never mind some guy wearing black armor just ran into the Blue Base." Said Sasuke

"What! Oh wait that's just Lopez."

"Lopez, who the hell is Lopez?"

During the radio conversation Tucker, Sister and Jr. walked up to them.

"Hey what up red fagots." Said Tucker

"What did you just call me you stinky Blue." Said Simmons

"You heard me Simmons I called a fagot live it embraced it have sex with it hell marry it." Said Tucker

"How the hell can I do all that dumbass?" Said Simmons

"Hell how should I know? It's not in the matrix where Neo goes and meet the Arabian guy and told him that Love is a word and some other thing or whatever." Said Tucker

"Hey would you two Shut the hell up plus everything your talking about is really disturbing in every level." Said Griff

"Honk, Honk, Honk Blarg"

"What the hell did that thing just said?" Said Griff

"It's not at thing it's my kid." Said Tucker

"What the hell that's your kid? Looks like the devil's kid." Said Griff

"Don't ever talk like that about my kid." Tucker said with a stern voice,

With Sasuke and Sakura

"Um, Sasuke what the matter?" Said Sakura

"…I have no idea how any body conversation can be this stupid and retarded…"

"Okay?"

Back in inside the Blue base

"Yo Naruto great news Hinata is going to be…Hey Lopez how is it going? I mean…como estas compadre?"

"…Eres un idiota." (you are an idot) said Lopez

"what ever you know you love me as friend."

"Okay Doc Shut up just shut up." Said Naruto

"Hey you are the one who blew me up. Will you be my friend?" said Caboose and then he was hit on the head by Lopez. "Oww! That really hurt a lot. Oh great know I see the rubber duck again and he still laughing at me."

"Is he going to be okay? He's doesn't look all that great?"

"Don't worry about Caboose I think he already lost most of his brain cells because of the possession of O'Malley and the part that he was blown up and also the part where he was hit on the head so many times."

"Possession? HE WAS POSSESSED BY WHOM!?" Shouted Naruto

"Yeah Sarge didn't told you guys about O'Malley that guy nuts." Said Doc

"Who… is he?"

"Long story make it short. He's an evil AI whop wants to rule the universe then destroy it."

"But why?"

"I read his mind for a little because he possessed me to…"

"WHAT HELL!?"

"…it was something about gold and silver I don't know, he left my body before I can read all his thoughts."

"_Gold and Silver; who the hell are they_?" thought Naruto "Wait a minute you said some thing about Hinata?"

"Oh right she fine all she needs is to sleep and have a blood transfusion that's all."

Naruto sighed and decided to be with Hinata until she wakes up.

Inside Red Base

"It's done IT"S DONE HAHAHAHAHAHA" Insane Sarge

"Sarge are you done, is Tex okay, every thing went well?" said Church

"What no Church my sandwich is done that's what."

"You're Sandwich. You're MOTHER FUCKING SANDWHICH. SARGE YOUR SOPOSSED TO BE HELLPING TEX YOU FUCKING DUMBASS!" Shouted a reallyx10 angry Church

"Yeah I know stop shouting. I'm already done with the surgery she's right over there, she's all right Church. All she needs is some sleep."

Church ran over to Tex side. "How is she doing Sarge? Is she able to do every thing what she was able to do?"

"Yup every thing but I gave her a little something." Said Sarge

"What's that Sarge? I can take it."

"I gave her a penis."

"WHAT THE HELL!!??" The shout was so loud that even the earth citizens on Mars could have heard it. "You gave Tex a PENIS!" said Church

"Hehehe no I was just busting your balls. She's alright; she can do every thing what she used to do or even better. That reminds me Lopez is taking a very long time with the rookies." said Sarge

"Oh thank God. Wait rookies oh you mean the other two who fell out of that portal." said Church

"Portal; what portal?" said Sarge

Out side of Red Base

"Hey you guys did hear that didn't ya." Said Tucker

"Oh yeah Sarge became a badass again. HELL YA." Said Griff

"Oh man Sarge is so Awesome YEAH." Shouted Sister

"Sister your on our not the Reds. And what do you mean he's a badass he's a horrible tactician plus…"

"He told Church he gave Tex a penis." Simmons said very fast

Tucker looked at Simmons for a minute then another minute… yeah whatever two hours later"…Oh man that's such a good burn; Sarge is a BADASS."

"How the heck did it took that long to process it in your peanut size brain Tucker." Mocked Griff

"Up yours red"

"I'm Orange not red dumbass."

"Hey you guys know the radio is still on." Said Sasuke

End chapter six


	7. Chapter 7

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 7

Naruto walked down to the basement to see Hinata lying down on the ground. She has

Medical oxygen masks helping her to breath and an ice pack on her head keeping the fever down. But everything else she looked fine. He knelt down beside her and looked down at her and remembering everything before all this happen.

Somewhere in a dark forest in the Land of Sound

The land of Sound was at war with the land of Fire and there was utter chaos on both fronts. Five hundred meters away from the sound village four ninjas are tracking down Orochimaru and his right hand man Kabuto.

"Naruto, you and Hinata go to the right. Try to get in front of them so we can corner them." Said Sasuke

"Right! Let's go Hinata."

Hinata nodded her head. They took off from the right, as Sasuke and Sakura…

"Sakura we need to move faster in order to catch up to Orochimaru."

She nodded and quicken their pace and same goes for the other two Nin.

Red Base

"Heeee, the blues will never believe their eyes when I unleash my new invention." Said Sarge

"What is it Sarge…A SLUSHY MACHINE!" Said Griff

"Yup a slushy, quite ingenious don't you say men."

"Yes sir. It's the smartest plan you ever had." Said Simmons

"Kiss ass." Said Griff

Back to the battlefield

"Nar…Naruto were almost catching up to them."

Naruto nodded and started to move faster than before.

Four minutes later.

Naruto and Hinata stood in front of Orochimaru and Kabuto way.

"Move out of the way Kyubi." Growled Orochimaru

"Make me snake." Growled Naruto. Red eyes begin to form. Then Sasuke and Sakura were behind the missing Nin.

"Damn it all, I'll kill you all; but ladies first right Kabuto." Orochimaru smiled insanely

"Right, Lord Orochimaru."

At red base

"Who wants slushy?! I know you like strawberry Griff." Said Sarge

"Umm…no thank you sir."

"Fine you get none. You pansy." Sarge turned on the slushy machine and started to make wired noises. After a while it started to glow celestial colors.

"Oh boy that's not good." Said Simmons

Back at the battlefield

Orochimaru race toward Sakura and Kabuto race towards Hinata as they neared to their target but their attack was in vane. They were stopped by Sasuke and Naruto; Sasuke powered up his chidori and Naruto his rasengan.

"This ends now!" said in union

But it was in vane as well, as the sky ripped apart into a large portal swallowing everything in it's path.

"WHAT THE HELL?!" everybody

Red base

"Sarge…Sarge their's a big swirly thingy outside and shooting everything insight." Said Donut

Simmons and Griff looked at each other than at the slushy machine.

"Ah Shit." Union

Back with the Nin

The Nin were being drawn at the portal. Naruto held Hinata while he tried to hold on to the root of the tree. Sasuke was behind a rock covering Sakura from the Portal. As for the others they already have been swallowed by the portal.

Orochimaru yelled out "Ahhhhhh this can't be…" he was fallowed by an equal scared Kabuto.

The Nin could hold on to their position and were drawn into the portal.

"Noooo Hinata!"

"Naruto!!! Naruto!"

"Sasuke!!"

"Sakura!!!"

…

At blue base

"What the hell is going on out here!?" said Church "uh oh" Church looked up and saw the portal throwing out four people; two were thrown 20 meters towards the blue base and the other two were thrown 25 meters from the red base.

"Ah shit who the hell did this."

…

"Naruto…Naruto…NARUTO!!!"

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT DOC!?"

"I told ask if you want to be the blood donor for Hinata?"

"Wait? What?"

"Hinata needs blood and if she doesn't she might not recover well. Do you want to be the blood donor?"

"Um, Doc me and Hinata don't have the same blood."

"Don't worry about that while you were in your little world I took out some blood from you and tested and your fine."

"What the hell?"

"Yeah it was easy, so you want to be the blood donor."

"Sure why not."

"Alright this won't hurt much." He pulled out a drill.

"What the HELL. I thought it would be a needle not a drill."

"Needle's we don't use needles we use drills plus it hurts less if you struggle."

"That's not, that's not right at all!"

"Fine I'll use this then." Docs took out his gun and tranquilize Naruto. He fell down to ground and tried to get up but gave up.

"Yup I'm going to die. Hell I never had sex with Hinata. Damn it thanks a lot Doc!"

"Suck it bitch."

"Oh great, now he's cursing at me, great."

Thirty minutes of really disturbing details. Naruto was at a fetal position because of the drill.

"Alright I am done here you just stay here…like that…perfect." Said Doc

Sasuke and Sakura came down to the basement to see what was happening.

"Um doc what did you do with Naruto?" Said Sasuke while looking down at Naruto.

"Nothing all I did was a blood fusion."

"What type of blood fusion is it when somebody drills in your ass?!"

"WHAT THE HELL?!" Sakura and Sasuke said

"Hey it's the future live it."

Back at red base

"So this is it what made the portal. A SLUSHY MACHINE!" said Church

"Oh yeah, want some slushy? I know you want's some." Said Sarge

"Um…no thank you…but Sarge don't you know what you just did?"

"Of course I do; I made a damn good slushy machine."

"Sarge you open a portal to another world and who knows how many came into this world and now their stranded here until you fix this thing to reverse the process."

"How in Sam Hill do I do that, hm? Do you think slushy machine like this come often, do ya."

"Sarge just fix it so we can send them back to their world and then we can go back on finding O'Malley."

"But it's a good Slushy…"

"I don't care about the fucking slushy machine fix it, fix it, fix it."

"Fine I'll "fix" the Slushy Machine so we can send them…" All of a sudden the Slushy Machine blew up.

"Fuck this isn't happening" said Church

"Yup slushy blew up."

End chapter


	8. Chapter 8

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 7

At Blue Base

Two hours after Doc did the blood transfusion Hinata started to wake up. "…What happen…?" Naruto was still at his pouting at over what just happen. "Na…Naruto…is that…you." She said weakly. "Hey Hinata you're awake." Naruto got out of his trance and went over to Hinata. "How are you feeling Hinata?" "Fi-fine." Naruto gazed at her white eyes and Hinata did the same. Trance by each other Naruto moved closer to Hinata's lips when suddenly. "Aww. Isn't that cute. You know we should have more of that here. But with the shooting and plotting and the O'Malley wanting to rule the universe and the rubber duck." Said Caboose still lying on the ground.

"Maybe if we weren't so mean to each other we can throw a big party with cake, soda, oh oh a really big piñata."

Now Naruto was pissed at what Caboose ruing a romantic time with Hinata. "Lopez."

"Si." Lopez ran over to Caboose and smacks him on the head. "Ow. All I want to do is make a party. (WACK) Ow. Oh now the rubber duck is laughing at me again."

At Red base

"Okay Sarge we need to talk about this to the others." Said Church

"Others, we don't need to explain this to nobody."

"What-Yes we do you're stupid slushy machine was the reason why all this happening."

"Well if my slushy machine wasn't glowing and opening other portals maybe-"

"Wait WHAT other portals."

"Well after the one that open in blood gulch open several others were open as well."

"WHAT HOW MANY WERE OPEN MAN!?"

"Hm, about six others or more."

"SIX! SIX OTHERS WERE OPEN! SARGE WHAT THE HELL DID YOU PUT IN THAT SLUSHI MACHINE."

"Well you know screws, bolts, cooling machine, and Covenant technology."

"What was that you just said?"

"Covenant Technology that's what! Damn these youthful kids with their devil may care attitude and soda machines. Yeah."

"Covenant…Technology. COVENANT TECHNOLOGY YOU PUT COVENANT TECHNOLOGY IN THAT SLUSHY MACHINE! WHAT THE HELL SARGE!"

Out side of red base

"Did anybody hear that or is it just me?" Said Simmons

"No Simmons I think it's just you. Because of you're kiss ass attitude and you're poor leader ship and you're giga pet collection." Said Griff

"Giga pet collection? You have a giga pet collection Simmons. Who even have those toys anyway? Wait I know one YOU SIMMONS YOU PANSSY." Said Tucker

"(Sniff) I'm no pansy. You're just jealous that's all." Said Simmons

"Jealous? Jealous of what that I don't have a life. That I rather look at porn in the computer rather feeding a virtual dog that doesn't exist." Said Tucker

"He does exist! He does!" said Simmons

"Man Simmons this is really sad you know. I think you need a life, listen tonight were taking you to a striper bar. How does that sound." Said Griff

"It sounds okay." Said Simmons

"Yeah BOOBIES! I haven't seen boobs ever since I did you're sister Griff. Bow chicka bow bow."

"Okay that's enough about my sister Tucker."

"Hey Griff, who did her doggy style? ME THAT"S WHO! Bow chicka bow bow."

"Tucker that's enough!"

"Just one more. Hey Griff who dis you're sister at her first date? MEEEEE! Bow… Actually that's really mean. Sorry about that."

"…I really hate you."

At blue base

Sasuke and Sakura came down to the basement to see Naruto and Hinata.

"Hinata you're awake!" said Sakura

"Hey Naruto I see you're out of the trance how are you holding up." Said Sasuke

"Well I still have this sore in my ass and I can't feel my ass but everything else I'm OK. What about you?" Said Naruto

"Cheh I'm alright."

"OK. What about you Hinata how are you feeling?" said Sakura

"I'm still a little dizzy by everything but I feel fine." Hinata tried to stand up but she was still a little lightheaded. That's when Lopez came in. "Azul oh no es azul es blanco y verde. No se quien eres? Quien eres verde?" Said Lopez. "Um Naruto do you know what he just said?" said Sasuke. "Haven't the slightest idea." Said Naruto. "Yo soy Lopez el pesado. Y yo odio azules."

"He said he's Lopez yes and he doesn't like blues yes oh no my head hurts." Said Caboose

"Caboose you can understand him?!" said Naruto

"Yeah—I mean no…well actually I don't know. I'm just listening to what the rubber duck is telling." Said Caboose

"Caboose there's no rubber duck hear." Said Sasuke

"Yes there is its right there. Why can anybody see it?"

Back at red base

"So you stole Covenant didn't you Sarge." Said Church

"No I just took some out of the military garbage that we had over that convenient closet we have there." Said Sarge

"Wait a minute you guys have a closet!?"

"Yep thanks to the GREAT MASTER CHIEF we have spar parts of the Covenant technology. (Sniff) I'm so lucky to be his great, great grandson."

"Wait a minute you're not his grand son…"

"And why not?"

"Because I'm his grandson."

"No I'm his grandson!"

"Hey what you guys talking about?" said Griff. Simmons, Donut, Tucker, Sister, and Jr. came with him.

"Were arguing who is MASTER CHIEF Grandson is." Said Church

"We agree it's me!" Said Sarge

"No we didn't we didn't agree about anything."

"Well what about if I tell you that I'm MASTER CHIEF grandson." Said Tucker

"Tucker you! Ha don't make me laugh!" Said Church

"Well I could be MASTER CHIEF Grandson" said Griff

"Yeah me and Griff could be related to MASTER CHIEF." Said Sister

"Griff, Sister no offense but you will never be MASTER CHIEF Grandchildren." Said Church

"Well I could be MASTER CHIEF Grandchild." Said Simmons

"What about me?" Said Donut

"Simmons you could be, Donut I doubted." Said Sarge

"Well it's settle then I'm MASTER CHIEF grandson." Said Church. Everybody looked at Church.

"NO I'M HIS GRANDCHILD!" Said Sarge

"NO I'M HIS GRANDCHILD!" Said Griff

"Hey wouldn't that both of us his grandchild?" said Sister

"…Yeah I think I'm adopted." Said Griff

"Blarg blarg blarg?" Said Jr

"What the hell did that Jr. just said?" said Church

"I think he said that he is MASTER CHIEF Grandson." Said Tucker

40 minutes later

"Okay here is the CHIEF family Tree and…not one of us is related to MASTER CHIEF. Dman."Said Church

"Well now what?" said Tucker

Twenty minutes later

"…You know what's ironic about all this…" said Sarge

"Oh no not this again." Said Church

"I think were wasting too much time here than looking for O'Malley."

"Yep too much time here…hey does anybody know were Lopez and the newbie's are at?" said Simmons

"No I told him to go find them what hell he should be here about a long time ago." Said Sarge

"I think he's out scoring some drugs Sarge." Said Donut

"Donut shut up." Said Simmons

End chapter


	9. Chapter 9

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 9

Blue Base

"So..Lopez why are you doing here anyway. Way." Said Caboose

Lopez looked at Caboose for a minute and hit him on the head. "Oww my head!"

"Yeah why are you here Lopez? Did Sarge want us to come back to red base?" said Naruto "Sarge?..." said Hinata "Yeah um Sarge is our leader…I think he wants me and Sasuke to die or even not live. Plus he's the one who gave me this new face." Said Naruto "Some leader, our leader is kind to us but he's really bossy to everyone else." Said Sakura "Yeah Church can be a little mean but for real he is like a huggable teddy bear."

At red base

"For some strange reason I have this need to kill Caboose." Said Church

Back at blue base

"Si nesecitas a regresa a base rojo." Said Lopez

"…Um Caboose can you translate for us." Said Naruto

"Yes Lopez said we need to bake a cake."

"What did he really said that!?!?" said Sasuke

"Yes I mean no—I don't remember my own name. Who are you? Who am I? I like babies, yes"

"Oh boy due to all the hits that Lopez did to Caboose he lost his memory." Said Sasuke

"Maybe Doc can help us." Said Hinata

"Yeah—wait were is Doc!" said Naruto

With Doc

"Ah it's nice to have some time for myself." Doc turned on the TV and started to watch…PowerPuff Girls!?!?!?!? "Yeah go Blossom kick the monkey's a double s."

Back at Blue base

"Maybe it's better for us not to look for him." Said Sasuke

"Yeah I think you're right Sasuke. Hey maybe Griff can help us." Said Naruto

"Naruto, Griff hates us. He hates us like there is no tomorrow."

"Yeah so, I think he can be reasonable sometimes." (radio turned on)

"Alright you're funereal."

"Griff this Naruto can you hear me? Griff!"

"Oh no not you. Anything but you. God kill me NOW! I'LL DO ANYTHING GOD PLEASE DO THIS FAVOR FOR ME PLEEEEEEEEEASSSSSE!"

"Okay maybe you were right Sasuke. Maybe he does hate us."

"Maybe you can contact another member from your team." said Hinata

"Hey you're right Hinata. Sarge come in Sarge this is Naruto."

"Naru who?! Who is this!?"

"Sarge it's me the one you blew my face and arm off."

"WHAT!?!?!?!?" shouted the girls

"Oh yeah how ya doing. Hey how is the other doing, with his leg and arm off and all. Um what's his name again um…it was something gay like one of those fagots I always see in the streets. Actually Naruto you also reminde me of one those kind of people." Naruto and Sasuke were in the corner pouting "WERE NOT GAY!" Hinata and Sakura had HUGE sweat drops.

"Wait a minute Narupo you need to come back to base." Said Sarge

"Narupo!?!? My name is not Narupo its Naruto! NARUTO!!!"

"Yeah whatever faggot you and your husband need to come back to base pronto. Sarge out."

"WERE NOT GAY!!!!!!!" They pouted some more in the corner.

Back at Red Base

"Do you really think they'll come back after what you just said?" Said Simmons

"………Yeah they'll come back." Said Sarge

Back at Blue

Naruto and Sasuke were still pouting over what Sarge just said. So they both left to steal the Reds War Hog. First reason to get them back, and Second reason so they can help Hinata to Red Base. Now Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura left the Blue Base and left Hinata with Caboose (bad idea.)

The gang were out of the Blue perimeter. "Alright do any of you have a plan to steal the War Hog?" Sasuke and Sakura looked at Naruto. "Okay how about we-"

"No Naruto, not that idea."

"I didn't even say anything; and who made you leader Sasuke!"

"Tsunade remember."

"Well that's Baa-chan, she's crazy."

"Alright Naruto let's see your idea."

"Okay, let's see, my idea is that we sneak into the Red perimeter and we steal the War Hog."

"Is that all? That's a horrible plan Naruto!" Said Sakura

"Why's that Sakura?

"What if there's resistance?"

"Oh come on Sakura they're on our side, who will shoot their own team."

The gang reached to the top of a hill and saw Sarge shooting Griff. "What the hell, you said they won't shoot at their own team!" Said Sakura

"Ummm………How about we run over there and just steal the War Hog before anybody see us."

"Naruto that's a stupid idea!" Said Sasuke

"Well Sasuke do you have a better idea?!!!" Sasuke space out for a minute or two. "No." He lowered his head with shame.

"I guess so, so we all agree my idea is the best idea. Right!" Sasuke and Sakura stared blankly at Naruto. "Yup my idea is the best!" Both still blankly at Naruto.

Back at Red Base

"Sorry about that Griff but I was full of steroids that I need to somehow get rid of the extra energy."

"What! Since when did we have steroids in the base?"

"Remember Griff it was that time when we had to invade the Blue Base." Said Simmons

"Um…When was that? We invaded the Blue Base so many times." Said Griff

"When we got the War Hog remember."

"Oh yeah now I remember." Griff sighed by the memories.

"Speaking of the War Hog. Griff, Simmons bring in the War Hog for repairs."

"Right Sarge." Said Simmons "Okay." Said Griff

Outside of the Red Base.

"Alright where did we leave the war hog anyway? Oh yeah it's right there. But why is it all busted up?" Said Simmons

"Remember the crazy bitch blew it up." Said Griff

"Oh yeah that's right. Well now what?" That's when Naruto and the gang came. The gang somehow flipped the jeep over and got on it and drove away. Simmons and Griff just saw them drove away with it.

"Okay? Why did they took our jeep for?" said Simmons

"………Road trip."

"What?! Really, road trip?"

"I'm just guessing. I really don't care where they took the jeep. As long they aren't here its fine with me."

"You mean Naruto and Sasuke."

"Yeah I don't really want to hear their names again."

"Why do you hate them Griff?"

"I have my reasons."

"…Want to talk about."

Back with the Nins

"Man that was easy. But I don't get why I can't drive." Naruto was in the back, Sasuke was driving, and Sakura was next to Sasuke in the front. "Well that's because you don't know how to drive." Naruto got angry at Sasuke. "Hey you don't know how to drive either!" "Well I'm a genius and you're not; Naruto."

"Damn you Sasuke!"

"Hey Naruto just shut up!" shouted Sakura

Five minutes later

"Hey Hinata were back! Hinata; where are you? Hinata!" Naruto started to panic and ran all over the Blue Base. Finally outside of Blue Base. "Guys I can't find Hinata anywhere!"

"WHAT! WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T FIND HINATA?" Said Sakura

"Well I went to the room where we left her and she wasn't there. Then I ran all over the base trying to find her but still NOTHING!"

"Oh this is just great Naruto, first you shot her then you lost her! What's next have sex with her and get her pregnant during all of this." Druing the time that Sakura was talking Sasuke went into the base to find any clues

"Well the sex part maybe, but the pregnant part not such a fan." Sakura hit him on the head with her gun. "DUMBASS!"

"Hey you two get in here I found something." Said Sasuke. So Sakura while dragging a unconscious Naruto went into the base. Sasuke showed a disc like gizmo on the floor.

"What do you think it is?" Said Sakura

"Hn, how should I know? Where's Lopez; heck where's Caboose or even Doc?" Said Sasuke Naruto woke up and accidently placed his hand on the disc it activated showing a small video.

"Blarg, Blarg, Blarg, Garff, Hung, Chew, Huang!" A group of alien creature was on the video.

"What the hell are they saying?!!!"

"Hey you stupid thing talk human." The disc translated the message.

"We are the Convent! We served under our new leader O'Malley and the Gold and Silver we have your comrades and if you ever want to see them again you will meet us at this location. Terminate message…………Hhehehe Man the chick in the white armor has huge honkers don't you think—what? What do you mean were still on? Oh shit terminate message, terminate quick."

"Oh no this is not good Hinata and the others have been kidnap." Said Sakura

"Yeah this is bad. They didn't tell us Hinata's bra size." Sasuke nodded with agreement then Sakura hit the boys on the head. "Perverts!" Sakura left the Blue Base fuming.

"Geez what's her problem." Said Naruto

"She's angry because you care more about Hinata's boobs than her being kidnap and all."

"That's a lie…Wait…HINATA BEEN KIDNAP??????!!!!!!!!!!"

"NARUTO YOU ARE SO STUPID YOU KNOW THAT!"

End chapter

Author's notes: In this chapter there was going to be a lemon scene with Nar/Hin and Sas/Sak but I decided not to. Plus for extra while they were doing it Sarge, Church and the others would be watching them without them even noticing them and making fun of them. So if you want me to make a lemon scene like that; review it!


	10. Chapter 10

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 10

Two hours later after O'Malley left Blood Gulch, O'Malley arrived at Lock Out. O'Malley looked around the area and notice two people at the center of Lock Out. "Hmhmhhmhm yes this place is perfect. Remote, dark, and snowing too. It's perfect hmmm yes. Wyoming this is O'Malley what is your position?"

"O'Malley, this is Wyoming speaking I've just arrived at Lock Out mate." Said Wyoming

"Perfect everything going as plan. Oh one more thing Wyoming thank you for secretly deliver the empty suit."

"No problem ol' chap I'll meet you in the lower level."

"Oh one more thing, did you kill two civilians when you got here."

"Oh yes those two. Don't bother I already killed them. I think their names were Orochimaru and Kabuto or something. It matters not they're dead already."

"No wait, this is a brilliant idea tonight we play GOD Wyoming."

"Gotcha mate, over and out." O'Malley started to laugh then chock on something and started to cough. "Ugh I knew I shouldn't eat that Dairy Queen Burger."

O'Malley arrived at the lower level seeing Wyoming and four others with him. "Excellent the leaders of Gold and the leaders of Silver. Forge (Gold leader), Nike (Gold second), Striker (Silver leader) and HEOTI (Silver Second)…… HEOTI? I'm going to regret this. What in blazes does that mean anyway—HEOTI?"

"It means Hormone.Erection.Of.The.Ill."

"……You're kidding. Tell me you're joking."

"Nope."

"………….I'm not going to talk to you at all."

"Whatever, oi Wyoming where the restroom I have this huge knocker in my pants."

"Up stairs to the right." HEOTI left while everyone just watch him leave.

"From now that's his own restroom and only his, the others are off limits." Everyone agreed.

"So—O'Malley what's the—plan." Striker said in a western fashion.

"The plan is simple. I have this little problem with the Red commanders and Blue commanders and I want them eliminated immediately."

"That's it? That's the fucking it. Oh well fucking doodle do. The great O'Malley has a little problem with red and blue and he can't do a FUCKING THING ABOUT IT! You mother fucker." Said Forge spoke in an Irish accent.

"………Where are you from again?" said Wyoming

"I'm from fucking New York fucking City. Got it you fucking English piece of shit. And don't forget that! New York City is the fucking place to live. Every day could be you're fucking last fucking day."

"Oh sweet Jesus." O'Malley then got hit on the head by Forge.

"HOW DARE YOU HIT YOU'RE SUPPERIOR!" Then Forge point his gun at his face.

"Using the Lords name in vane in front of and you get one ticket to hell mother fucker."

"Got it." O'Malley had to be careful around Forge or his head get blown up to kingdom come. "Okay what about you Nike do you have anything to say?"

"Whatever." Nike had an overconfident tone.

"Okay then go to it. Except for you Forge." The leaders left except for Forge.

"I have a job for you."

After an hour passed a ship with seven Convent soldiers arrived with three others.

"You have arrived. Did you bring Tucker?" said Wyoming

"Well…we don't know?" said the leader.

"What?!" Wyoming looked at the prisoners. He saw Hinata, Caboose and Lopez but no Tucker.

"You fools! You have the wrong soldier."

"Don't worry Wyoming—" O'Malley walked up to him. "Forge will take care of him and the others."

At Blood Gulch

"What do you mean the rookies took the jeep?!" Sarge yelled at Griff but not Simmons.

"Hey Simmons was with me why ask him to."

"He's got a point there Sarge."

"Oh shut Simmons."

"Yes sir."

"Griff I want you and Simmons to find that jeep before I decide to kill you Griff."

"What?! What about Simmons he was with me."

"Again, point taken."

"Simmons!"

"Yes sir."

Outside of Red Base

Naruto and the others arrived at red base with the jeep.

"Okay so what do we tell them Sasuke?"

"What the hell do you mean Naruto?"

"Oh come one we just go in there and say hey my girlfriend was kidnap by a man name O'Malley with the Covenant and Gold and Silver army and we need your help."

"What?!" Church heard everything and so did Tucker, Sister, Donut and Jr.

Naruto and Sasuke saw Jr. and their eyes popped out. "What the hell? What is that THING?!" United they said.

"That thing is my son dude."

"What?"

"Boys let me handle this." Said Sakura "Church Hinata was kidnap by weird aliens that almost look like Jr. here but no relation. Anyways they said something about Gold and Silver and about this guy name O'Malley. Do you have any idea what their talking about."

"O'Malley part yes. But the Gold and Silver that's impossible."

"What…what do you mean Church?"

"The Gold and Silver is highly top secret army working for the government. Something like spy and ninja like worriers. They don't just work for someone like O'Malley, so it's impossible for the Gold and Silver army to work for anybody else even for O'Malley."

"But this recording disk said everything about them."

"Huh let's see it then. Hey wait a minute were Caboose?"

"Yeah where's Lopez?" Said Donut

"They capture them as well."

"Oh boy this isn't."

Then Simmons, Griff and Sarge came out of the base.

"Hey rookies!" Griff came running at Naruto and Sasuke hitting them on the head.

"What the hell Griff?!" Shouted Naruto

"What the hell…What the hell? By stealing the jeep you almost got me killed you motherfuckers!"

"Never have I seen Griff this angry since I rented a tape of his sister striping." Said Simmons

"Wait since when did I do that again? I don't remember at all." Said Sister

"I think it was on that hot sunny day when you were I the shower with your hard rock breast, and cover with oil because Jr. wanted to make a burrito and, and…" Tucker started to drool out of his helmet.

"Tucker, Tucker snap out of it." Gunshot missed Church's head by few inches. "What the!" Then more gunshots at the others.

"Now you will receive us.

We do not ask for your poor, or your hungry.

We do not want your tired and sick.

It is your corrupt we claim.

It is your evil that will be sought by us.

With every breath, we shall hunt them down.

Each day we will spill their blood, 'til it rains down from the skies.

_Do not kill. Do not rape. Do not steal._

These are principles which every man of every faith can embrace.

These are not polite suggestions; these are codes of behavior, and those of you that ignore them will pay the dearest cost.

There are varying degrees of evil.

We urge you lesser forms of filth not to push the bounds and cross over into true corruption, into our domain.

For if you do, one day you will look behind you and you will see we three, and on that day you will reap it.

And we will send you to whatever god you wish."

Forge was standing on a cliff with two others behind him. They all held dual pistols.

"And shepherds we shall be  
For Thee, my Lord, for Thee  
Power hath descended forth from Thy hand  
That our feet may swiftly carry out Thy command  
So we shall flow a river forth to Thee  
And teeming with souls shall it ever be  
_In nomine Patri, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti"_

After the prayer they started shooting at every body. Simmons went to the Machine gun on the war hog, but Forge without looking at him shot him in the head.

"Simmons! Oh this is just great I lost my best man. Damn it!"

Sarge started to shoot at Forge and his men, but their shield was to powerful and moved out of his range. With amazing speed Forge got behind Sarge aiming his gun to his head shooting him.

"Sarge!"

Donut shot every bullet he had at him, but he had such horrible accuracy that Forge didn't even need to move at all.

"You're horrible with that weapon boyo you know that."

"Yeah this what I get for just looking at _Teen Magazine_ Hell Yeah!"

Without hesitation Forge wacked him on the head. Then he eyed Griff.

"Oh shit this sucks."

"Hey religious nut!"

Tucker came at him with his sword but Forge shot him in the legs making him trip over.

"Oh thanks a lot Tucker."

"Hey fuck you."

Forge went back to Griff aiming both his gun at his head.

"This is it. Damn it and I wanted to go to the playboy mansion before I die."

Naruto and Sasuke came up behind Forge and fired their weapons. Forge ducked cover and the bullets hit Griff instead.

"Ah Jesus you guys suck."

Forge shot him in the eye for saying the Lords name in vain. With his other gun he shot the weapons out of their hands then shot them in the arms and the legs.

"Sasuke! Naruto!"

Sakura rushed at him shooting at him. With blazing speed Forge came up behind her and shot her in the chest.

"SAKURA!!!"

Sasuke tried to get but Forge shot again in the neck. Jr. shot him a couple times but with horrible accuracy and Forge shot him in the foot.

"JR!" Tucker yelled

"Blarg, blarg."

"Oh really you can do that?"

"Blarg"

"Never knew that."

Sister came behind him but he was hit on the head by the other two. The only target left was Church.

"Oh shit. For once I wish Caboose was so I can use his body as a shield."

Forge aimed both his gun to his head.

"Shit"

To be continue

Authors note: The speech and the prayer belongs to the Boondocks Saint not me.


	11. Chapter 11

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 11

Forge pointed his gun at Church's head.

"Oh shit this sucks. Oh well you got to die sometime. But why now I don't want to die now."

"Oh shut up boyo." Then Tex came out of nowhere punched him to his face throwing him a couple of yards.

"WHOA Tex you're alive and awake…you're not going to kill me are you Tex?"

"Someday Church but right now I'm pissed off."

Forge shot a couple of rounds at her and she was able to doge them all. Tex activated her invisibility and Forge activated his thermal vision and shot Tex's legs.

"Shit this sucks."

"Man this does sucks now there no one to fight him."

"Well you can fight him dumbass."

"But I don't want to fight."

Forge punched Church knocking him to the ground. He pointed his gun to his face.

"And shepherds we shall be  
For Thee, my Lord, for Thee  
Power hath descended forth from Thy hand  
That our feet may swiftly carry out Thy command  
So we shall flow a river forth to Thee  
And teeming with souls shall it ever be…"

"_This sucks I couldn't even save Sasuke or Sakura…Hinata I'm sorry…" _Naruto laid down on the ground can't even move an inch. _**"You are an idiot Kit. You know that"**_

"_Kyuubi?!"_

"_**I don't what's happening out there…but I do know this…I'm dying Naruto…"**_

"_What?! How…you can't die on me!!! I need your help to save Hinata!!"_

"_**Naruto I don't know why I am dying…but I do know this…there's something out there just as evil as me…something elusive…something ancient…it's even older than I."**_

"_What??? What do you mean older than you? Who the hell is older than a Nine thousand years old Fox?"_

"_**I don't know…(cough) This is it goodbye…Na…ru..to."**_

"_No Kyuubi!"_

Then Naruto's body started to change. Pain was going through his entire body as though it was evolving. His muscles became stronger, his bones became more flexible and stronger and his intelligence increase. Naruto's wounds were gone and he was able to get up with ease.

Forge turned while still have his foot on Church. Church saw Naruto transformed as well. "Naruto?" Question Church

Naruto reloaded his gun. "Spartan-119: Naruto reporting for duty."

"_**What's going on?"**_Kyuubi opened his eyes to see a cybernetic world. "Welcome AI: Kyuubi."

"**AI?" **

"Are you ready Kyuubi?"

"**Whatever."**Naruto smiled. "That's what I want hear."

Naruto charged at him at speeds that not even a hokage could even do. "Finally a challenged." Said Forge. With that Forge charged at him twice as fast. Then Naruto turned to the left leading Forge to the middle of the canyon.

"Who…Tex what just happen."

"It seems the SPARTAN program that I put when I was healing those two faggots work." Said Sarge sneaking up behind Church.

"What the HELL SARGE YOU'RE ALIVE!"

"Of course I am, I'm Sarge I never die."

"But how?"

"Simple I had Mercury in my helmet."

"Oh…WHAT?! MERCURY KILLS YOU SARGE!"

"Nonsense, that's just an urban myth."

"No it's not it really kills you Sarge."

"I know what you're trying to say and it won't work."

"It won't? What?"

"I know your plan Blue you just want me to remove the mercury out of my helmet and shoot me that's it right."

"Sure why not."

Naruto and Forge got to the middle, hiding behind rock for cover.

"_The power it's…immense. I can use this to help Hinata out, where ever she is."_

When he was done idolizing his new found power a grenade bounce next to him. "OH Shit!" Naruto jumped away from the grenade before it can explode. He landed safely away from the explosion but there was a new threat Forge started to shoot at Naruto with his twin pistols. He got hit a couple of times but was able to avoid the rest by taking cover behind a rock. Naruto breath steadily, few milliseconds latter he jumped over the rock and started to shoot at Forge. Forge dodge most of the bullets, he then jumped up where Naruto was and started punching him.

Now it was close combat, Naruto and Forge slammed their guns at each other breaking their weapons and drawing out their knives. Both made contact sliding their knife to the left then to the right, then making circular motions neither one letting their knife off the other. Finally they parted and charged at each other again, this time Forge was able to make a deep cut on Naruto's left leg. Then he threw a plasma grenade at his helmet and jumped away. Naruto quickly removed his helmet and threw it away far from him. Forge attacked him again this time to the face cutting a scar on his left eye without damaging his eye. Again Forge cut him at the stomach but Naruto was able to pierce his left shoulder and jumped away from Forge. Both panted heavily their knifes were cover with blood and both has major wounds. Naruto flipped his knife holding the with the knife point at the back of his hand and charged at him again. Forge did the same and charge at him, they were only a few meters away from each other. Ready to swing Naruto quickly keeled down and cutting Forge at the back of the knee, Forge fell down and Naruto pulled out a pistol shooting him at the back taking him unconscious. Naruto fell down to his knees panting heavily and a streak of pain went through his entire mechanical right arm. His new body was still new and he hasn't got used to it. Finally Naruto collapsed from exhaustion.

Back with O'Malley at Lock Out.

"HAHAHAHAHA, it seems that I have new experiment and she's perfect for the new SPARTAN-342 program. Soon both my new soldier and my experiments will be complete! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

"O'Malley what of the other two?" Said Wyoming

"Nothing. Their body couldn't take the program. Feed them to my experiments."

"Experiments?"

"The Flood Wyoming listen to my reports Wyoming!"

"Sorry about that mate." Wyoming left the basement and went to the highest peak of the station. "This is Wyoming…"

End Chapter


	12. Chapter 12

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 12

"_Naruto…where are you?"_ Hinata got up and looked around to see nothing but darkness, she also notices she wasn't wearing her armor instead she wore her old clothes. "Where am I?" Hinata walked around to see nothing. "Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke…NARUTO!" Hinata started to panic running around in circle. (GRAW) Hinata stop for a moment and looked at the darkness. "Wh..who'..s there?" Whip like thing came out of the darkness and grabbed her tightly and took her into the darkness. "What's happening, NARUTO!!!" The darkness started to crack like it was made out of glass. "What?" Then a bright light blinded her.

When Hinata open her eyes she saw someone with the same armor as she has but it was green. She then notice that she was still wrapped by a tentacle.

"What…is that?" Hinata looked up and thought she heard a girl's voice.

"I? I am a monument of all your sins." Hinata saw a large being came out of the darkness then someone else came down with tentacles wrapped around him. He seemed to be an alien being.

"Relax. I'd rather not piss this thing off." Said the SPARTAN

"Demon!" Said the alien

The large being huffed. "This one is machine and nerve, and has its mind concluded." He said to the SPARTAN. "This one is but flesh and faith, and is the more deluded." He said to the alien. "This one is love and passion, and has a heart of purity." He said to Hinata. "What?"

The other two disappeared and all was left was her and the gigantic being. "W..wh..who are you?" Hinata started to shake just by being alone with this monstrosity. "I? I am Gravemind, I am forge by the sins of the Forerunners and others." Hinata was confused. Who were the Forerunners and who were the others? "I-I-I-don't understand." Gravemind huffed and came closer to Hinata. She started to struggle. "Let go of me, NARUTO!!!"

"Soon you will, for this I promise..."

(beep, beep, beep) Hinata laid inside a capsule. "BWAHAHAHAHA soon very soon she will wake up and become a true SPARTAN. Hahahahaha" O'Malley basked his own intelligence. After O'Malley basked his intelligence noised were heard up stairs, when O'Malley examine the situation he was capture by Wyoming, Gold and Silver and others.

"What is the meaning of this?" Shouted O'Malley annoyed.

"This O'Malley." Wyoming shot his old boss at the head. O'Malley fell down partly dead. "Traitor…why…"

"For recreate the Flood and using The Flood for the destruction of planet Earth." Wyoming gave an order, and Nike and HEOTI threw him off the station.

The new soldiers looked at Hinata in the capsule. "Wyoming who is this?"

"This is girl is name Hinata Hyuga..."

"WHAT!!!!" All said in union. They all took off their helmets showing Neji, Tenten, Lee, Gai, Shikamaru, Ino, Choji, Asuma, Kiba, Shino, Kurenai and Kakashi.

"We need to get her out there!" Shouted Neji but Wyoming stop him. "Bad idea there mates, for if you did release her she will die. The SPARTAN program must download completely into her system."

"When the program is finished will she be the old same Hinata?" Said Kiba.

"No, she might be different, she'll be stronger, smarter, faster, heal faster and able to jump higher." Said Wyoming

(BEEPBEEPBEEP) Hinata's heart rate increased near to danger. "What the hell is happening to my cousin?!" Shouted Neji. "She—is having a bad dream." Said Striker, he then pull out a small cub glowing red. "This will help her..." Striker put the cub in a small slot. "The AI program will help her...especially this AI program."

Back with Hinata she was still coiled by the tentacles' of Gravemind. "Naruto...please help me..."

"There is no one who can save you; you are weak and you are alone. You depend on others to save you for this you are weak."

Tears rolled down her cheeks, she knew Gravemind was right. He read her like a book. "You're stronger than you think Hinata." A bright light appeared next to Hinata, the blinding light was terrifying and yet pleasuring, finally the light dim a bit for Hinata to see who spoke to her.

"It—it's...you?" It was the SPARTAN she saw a few minutes ago.

"You...I should have known that I would meet you again." Said Gravemind

Hinata pondered about the situation. "Who...Who are you?" She spoke to the SPARTAN.

"John SPARTAN: 117 but every calls me Master Chief." Hinata awed at his sight as though he was her knight in shiny armor come to save her from Gravemind. "But first..." Master Chief flipped off Gravemind and he disappears into the darkness.

Hinata was dumbstruck, all he did was flipped him off. "Um...Jo—Master Chief...um..mm.."

"Out with it woman!"

Hinata poked her fingers together. "...Thank you Master Chief..."

"No problem, now to finish this." Master Chief put his index finger to his ear. "This is SPARTAN 117 download all SPARTAN program to new host (beep beep beep ding) Time to wake up Hinata." She woke up in the capsule as the capsule open slowly, she step out of the capsule, she notice that she still was in the SPARTAN armor. "Was it all a dream?"

"No." said Master Chief

Hinata looked behind her then all around her. "Master Chief where are you."

"In your head."

"What?" Hinata's eye's popped out. "Hinata!" Hinata faced to the entrance to see Neji holding her then her entire team. "Neji...I can't breathe..."

"Oh sorry." Everyone said in union and getting off of her. Kakashi walked up to Hinata and nodded at her and she nodded back. "Hinata where's Naruto and the others?"

"They're at Blood Gulch."

"Blood Gulch?"

At Blood Gulch

"Sarge, where the hell is Naruto and that other guy?" said Church

"How should I know wait who's that?" Sarge pointed at Tex carried Naruto on her back.

"Damn this guy heavy." Tex threw Naruto on the ground. "Ow!" Naruto shouted.

"What the HELL, you're awake the whole time!"

"No, I woke up after you threw me to the ground!" He shouted at her face.

"Damn it this making me crazy! Sarge you better fix that stupid Slushy Machine or I'll kick your ass so hard that your nose will bleed!" Church yelled at Sarge while Tex and Naruto were fighting each other.

"How about no you freaking blue bastard."

"Oh yeah, it's on baby."

"How about this then…" Camera zooms out and next to Sarge was the Slushy Machine. "Tada and I had to do nothing at all."

"What the hell?! How-why-when-how the hell did you do that?"

"I have no idea what you are talking about Church? Simmons."

"Yes sir."

"What Simmons I thought you were dead!" Church shouted so loud that one can hear it all over the canyon.

"I'm not dead, I'm an android remember."

"No, I don't remember! Damn it what the hell is going on here?!"

"Hello."

"Oh hello Caboose…What Caboose?! How did you get away from the aliens?"

"Aliens?"

"CABOOSE?" Naruto pounded Caboose on the ground. "Where the hell is she Caboose?!"

"Who?"

"You know who, HINATA WHERE THE HELL IS SHE?!"

"Oh yeah Hinata……who?" Naruto pounded Caboose face in the ground. "Now I remember-"

"Apparently that hit on the head did it." Said Sarge

"This is what happen…When we landed on this base me that girl um Hinata and Lopez gather around a fire place."

"What a fire place?" Said Church

"Then we ran around with the rubber duck…"

"Not the rubber duck again!" Shouted Church

"Then we ate some marshmallows and gram crackers."

"Shut up Caboose!" Church went insane and held his gun next to Cabooses head.

End Chapter


	13. Chapter 13

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

AI

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 13

"And that what happen, until this point I don't know what they are doing." Said Hinata

"Well that's……interesting…" Said Kakashi, while everyone's eye's bulge out their sockets.

"Y-yes…well what about you Master Chief you have anything to say?"

"…The military must be getting lazy after the war." A huge sweat drop appeared behind her head. "It seems…it?" Everybody looked at Hinata while she talks to herself.

"Hinata, who are you talking to?" Kiba had a dumbstruck face. "Eh, oh it's the AI in my head, Master Chief."

"Okay…Hinata I think this world made you a bit crazy."

"No I'm…Oh no Lopez and Caboose!"

"WHAT?"

Hinata looked all the round the base only to find Lopez on the lower levels. "Lopez are you alright?" Hinata said, with a concern face.

"Si Senorita Hinata, yo estoy bien."

"That's good…hey I can understand you now! How is that?"

"Hinata I install a program that you now can understand any language."

"T-Thank you Master Chief."

"Y tu?"

"Wha? Oh I'm fine Lopez thank you, but where is Caboose?"

"Caboose fue en este transporter."

"Wha?" Hinata saw a green portal in the front of the room. "Oh that transporter. Wait we can use this transporter to go back to Blood Gulch."

"Don't enter the portal lassy or you'll end up anywhere in the galaxy." Said Forge

"Wha…who are you?"

"The name is Forge and I'm guessing your Hinata."

At Blood Gulch

"Okay Caboose for the last time where is O'Malley?" Church said calmly. Caboose turned his

head like an idiot.

"Caboose, where the hell is O'Malley?!" Shouted Naruto. "I don't know?" Caboose spoke

dropping his head.

"You don't know the hell you know!" Naruto started to choke Caboose.

"No he doesn't Naruto he's too stupid to remember." Church shook his head in shame. "I'm not

stupid O'Malley location is at Lock Down."

"………WHAT?!!!" Both Naruto and Church said in union. "Caboose! Why the hell did you not said in the first place?!" Church said while Naruto reloaded his gun.

"Ummm…because you didn't say please." Naruto just stared and aimed his gun to his face. "Whoa whoa whoa Naruto I know you want to kick O'Malley ass but-"

"I don't care about that motherfucker, I just want to find Hinata!"

"Fine but first we need to find O'Malley, we find him we find Hinata. But first we need to know how Caboose arrived here. So Caboose where-is-O'Malley?"

"……Who?" Church and Naruto started to beat the crap out of him.

In the Red Base

"Hey Sarge how is Sasuke and Sakura?" Said Tex

"Sus…Who?! Who is Sasuke, I don't know Sasuke?!" Sarge yelled

"Sarge he's one of your men." Sarge just looked at her blankly. "The one in Red Armor."

"Oh Simmons, he's fine, don't worry about him he's an android he's good."

Outside of Red Base

"Hey Simmons get out of the Warhog!" Griff shouted at Simmons which he was still holding the turret.

"Never Griff what if that religious nut comes back, then what?"

"He's gone Naruto got rid of him."

"Who…Who's Naruto?"

"He's……I have no idea?"

Back in Red Base

"Fine forget about Sasuke, how about Sakura?" Said Tex

"Sakura, she's fine, I have already download the SPARTAN program into her."

"Good" Tex looked at where Sasuke was at. "Okay so you also have downloaded the SPARTAN program in Sasuke."

"Who?" Tex dropped her head. "The FAGOT!" Sarge just remember about him.

"Oh yeah……who?"

"I hate you."

Back at Lock Out

"So you were hired to kill everyone at Blood Gulch……but why?"

"Buy some time; we needed to know what O'Malley true plans. So we team up with the Elites and sent a spy into his organization."

"So……is everyone—dead?"

"No I didn't kill no one, just knock them out."

"That's good, but how did you get back?"

"Simple I used this portal, but someone else went through the portal, in conclusion this portal only works once in less than two minutes. So if someone didn't went through the portal in less than two minutes the portal would send anyone at random."

"I see, what of O'Malley?"

"Don't worry about him he's gone."

A dead O'Malley laid on the floor of the canyon. His arms broken off, helmet crack and his armor cracked horribly. A few minutes later long tentacles grabbed O'Malley. "This is not your grave but you are welcome in it."

End Chapter


	14. Chapter 14

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

AI

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 14

"HAHAhahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!"

"Caboose stop laughing!!! What the hell are you laughing about???" Church yelled in the canyon.

"Well I like monkey's…and peanuts."

Church stared at Caboose blankly, "What do I have something on my face?" Then out of nowhere someone shot Caboose in the back of his head. But he didn't die.

"What the hell, Caboose you're supposed to be dead!!!"

"What do you mean Church?"

"What do I mean? WHAT DO I MEAN? If you get shot in the head you should be dead!!!"

"……Oooooohhhhhh……what?" Then someone shot him again in the back of his head and this time he fell down but still not dead.

"Church someone shot me and I feel dizzy."

"Nothing make sense anymore…but who the hell shot Caboose?" The camera zoomed quickly to the top of the red base and there everyone except for Naruto was either drunk and or high.

"Hahahaahah aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa BOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!" Shouted a high Griff

"Griff you dumbass why the hell did you inhale all the fumes in that bong???!!!" said a drunk Sarge.

"Hey last one to the warhog is a fucking Blue!!!" Simmons ran to the Warhog and Sarge and Griff followed. "HAHAHAHAHA I'M GOING TO BEAT SARGE HAHAHAH!" Then Sarge shot him in the head.

"Not anymore Griff!" With that he wasted his bullets in the air.

Back with Naruto. "…………What a bunch of dumbasses…damn it I wish Hinata was here."

"What's up red." Tucker walked behind Naruto. "Um hi Tucker how's it going?"

"Not much, so you know Hinata huh?"

"What um yeah, she's my girlfriend."

"Really your Girlfriend aww man and I was hoping that I can do it with her."

"What?!"

"Yeah she's has the biggest honkers that I ever seen."

"Tucker what the hell? You're talking about my girlfriend!"

"Plus give her sugar you know what I mean yeah yeah."

"……..Tucker what the fuck!!!"

"I would love to sleep with Hinata and that other girl Sakura."

"That's it!" Naruto punched him to the ground. "Dumbass…"

Back at Lockout Hinata stared at his cousin blankly. "Um Neji…what are you doing?"

"What I can't wee on the side of the station?"

"Um…I don't know I-" Hinata ran off a bit frighten until she hit Kakashi. "Kakashi…what…are…you doing?"

"Cleaning my bag jingo what else?"

"……I'm going to leave…" With that she left, again.

"What with her all I was doing was cleaning my gun."

Hinata came near to a ledge looking down in the cavern. "Hinata…" She turned to see Wyoming and Striker.

"Um hello."

"Sorry about all this but Master Chief's orders."

"What! What are you two going do to me?"

"This…" Wyoming and Striker grabbed her and threw her off the ledge. "I wonder how we're going to explain all this?" said Striker

"Crumpets"

"Crumpets? How is that going to explain all this?"

"What? Explain all this, nah I just want some crumpets."

"Oh?"

Back with Hinata she fell and fell until she fell into a large moat. (SPLASH) Hinata was able to jump swim out of the moat breathing heavily. "Master Chief, why did you order them to throw me off the base?"

"To get some answers."

"Answers, what answers?" Tentacles came out of a small cavern and grabbed Hinata. "What? What is this?"

"Don't struggle it'll only make it worse." But Hinata couldn't contain herself, the more she struggle the tighter the tentacles got, finally the tentacles grasp so tight that it knocked her out.

"Great, she's out cold."

Back at Lock Out

"Hey guys I was able to get that transporter to teleport to Blood Gulch!" said Striker

"Yay." They said in a bored tone.

Back at Blood Gulch Sasuke and Sakura just woke up and are now with Naruto.

"Hey Naruto what's going on out here?"

"You want the long version or the short version?" They stared at him. "Um Short version?" said Sakura

"Okay this what's happening, The Reds are over there going nuts on their warhog."

They the Reds driving like of high rednecks, then a rocket blew them up. "My bad!" said Donut

"……Okay, Donut just blew them up with a rocket launcher. Church is beating the crap out of Caboose." They see Church kneeling down beating the crap out of Caboose.

"And Tucker checking out Sakura's ass."

"What?!" Sakura turned to see Tucker kneeling down and looking at her ass.

"What's up baby wants some loving?"

"PERVERT!!!" (WHAM) Sakura pounded Tucker to the ground. "……That's great so wana have sex?"

"Damn it Tucker! Stop hitting on Sakura!" said Sasuke

"Oh Sasuke, you really care about me."

"Hell ya baby." They took of their helmets and kissed. Naruto just stared. "…….Don't you know that this is makes things difficult for me." They didn't listen to him at all. "Fuck you two then."

He walked off until he heard Tucker shouting to him. "Naruto, wait!"

"What is it Tucker?"

"Do you want to go to my secret place?"

"….No, no I don't want to go to your secret place."

"Oh c'mon, you need some time of yourself."

"Okay all what you're trying to do is make things even more difficult for me. So shut up and just leave me to my thought all……what, what is that up there?" Tucker looked up and saw two ships falling from the sky, one was a Convenient ship and the other was a UNSC ship. "Hey, it's one of ours. And a Convenient ship?" The ships landed near to the reds as everyone just saw the ships skid on the ground.

"Well that's strange…" said Church

"Church!" Tex shouted while running out the red base. "Get out of there!"

"What, what does that suppose to mean?"

"Just get out and come to base!" The ships then exploded and something came out of it.

"Oh no!" shouted Sarge

"It's.,.." said Griff

"It's…" said Simmons

"A teddy bear!" said Caboose

End Chapter

"I think it's a teddy bear…" said Caboose


	15. Intermission

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Intermission

"Brought to by make your own nuclear holocaust, it's so fun to see a mushroom"

"Sarge the other logo!" yelled Church

"Oh, Brought to you by peace, love kit make your kids happy blah blah blah…Can we get this over with!"

"In our first scene Young Romeo goes to beautiful you Juliet in the balcony scene. Action" Said Donut

"Only you can make something this girly Donut!" yelled Griff

"Shut up, begin scene…"

"Oh Romeo, Oh Romeo where art though oh Romeo….Why am I a girl Donut!" yelled out Simmons

"Because I said so, now keep playing"

"Oh yeah your so on my kill these people before dying."

"Hey he's on my list too!" said Griff

"KEEP PLAYING!"

"Whatever, here I am oh Juliet…Really I'm not GAY! Sarge why am I doing this again?"

"Because I say so that's why, now keep playing!"

"Ugh…"

"Oh Romeo…what the hell does this say Donut!"

"Just say it!"

"I want to shake my booty in your face Romeo! What the hell!"

"……………………………………………….Donut you are so DEAD to me."

"Oh just go up there and kiss!"

"Hell no!" Sarge cocked his gun at Griff. "……..Oh, oh alright!" Griff went up to Simmons and they looked at each other. "Sarge do I have to?" said Simmons

"Yes you do Simmons, unless plan KG."

"Yes sir and thank you sir"

"KG, what's that Sarge?"

"Oh you'll see Donut, you'll see?"

"KG what that……..Oh shit!" Simmons got out his rifle and wasted it on Griff.

"AAAAAHHHHHHH………………………….I'm still alive you know."

"Well at least we don't have to kiss, that's gross."

"Yeah, unless it's Sarge's ass."

"So true."

"Oh man Sarge who will now play Romeo and Juliet?"

"I know who!"

Enter Naruto and Sasuke

"Narupo, Sus, I know that your both gay…."

"No where not." said Sasuke

"And it's NARUTO AND SASUKE!" yelled Naruto

"And Donut needs a Romeo and Juliet so your both great candidates so go up there and kiss! NOW!"

"…………………………………………………………………………………………………….NO!" They said in union

"No, no so who will play Romeo and Juliet?" said Donut

Church and Tucker where on top of a cliff spying on the Reds. "What they're doing?"

"What?"

"I said what are they doing?"

"You just said five minutes ago!"

"Hey I don't have the fucking sniper rifle so don't bitch at me!"

"Listen for the last time they're……playing Romeo and Juliet….what the hell?"

"Romeo and Juliet? But you need a guy and a girl to play in that play. The Reds have nothing but guys. Oh boy."

"Hey look at that Simmons just shot Griff, again and again and again and again….man am I glad that I'm not Griff."

"Hey BLUES! COME DOWN HERE I NEED A FAVOR FORM YOU!" yelled out Sarge

"Hell Fucking no…."

Ten minutes latter all the Blues except for Caboose, who no one knew what they he was doing went to Red base.

"Alright Reds what you want!" said Church

"And no smartass stuff got it!" yelled out Tucker

"We need one of you to play Romeo and Juliet." Said Sarge

"Hell fucking no!" said Church

"Then Fuck you Blues!" yell out Griff

As the Reds and Blues fought Naruto, Hinata, Sasuke and Sakura saw their officers fighting like bunch of whining kindergartens. "Naruto…" Hinata poke her fingers together. "Yeah Hinata…"

"Well I was thinking." Naruto placed his left hand on her right shoulder. "If I profane with my unworthiest hand. This holy shrine, the gentle fine is this: My lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand. To smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss."

"You know Romeo and Juliet?"

"A little."

She giggled softly. "Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, Which mannerly devotion shows in this; For saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, And palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss." Naruto took off his helmet and so did she, tough she hasn't got used to that mechanical eye of his but soon she will, and they kiss.

Sasuke and Sakura looked at them, Sakura felt little left behind knowing that Sasuke will never want a girl like her. Then she felt someone holding her shoulder and it was Sasuke. He turned her to face him. "Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?"

"Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer." She smiled

"O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do; they pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair."

"Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake."

"Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take. Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged." He took of his helmet and took hers off as well.

"Then have my lips the sin that they have took." They came closer and closer to each others lips. "Sin from thy lips? O trespass sweetly urged!" Then kiss and what a kiss it was.

As for the Reds and Blues, they just watch. "………..That is perfect!" yelled out Donut

"Tell me about it, they got it down." said Tucker "Look at those pimps go, hell yeah!"

Soon Naruto and Sasuke took min a wedding hold and left to the Blue Base. "Wonder where they're going?" said Church "……Oh Shit!"

"Hell ya, pimps, and I didn't even need to teach them nothing."

"Tucker you know nothing on how to court a lady." said Tex

At Blue Base the Nins went to the lowest level in the base where they found Caboose talking to his "duck."

"Caboose you need to leave, now" said Naruto

"But I'm talking to rubbie ducky."

"Quack, Quack"

"Hey, what do you know, a duck." Though it didn't looked like a duck, it had the body of a swan a head of a eagle feet and legs of a ostrich and wings of a condor. "A one fucked up duck."

"Quack, quack…"

"Caboose leave now!" said Sasuke

"Oh okay lets go ducky."

"Quack, quack" Both finally left leaving the nin's alone.

"I wonder what would happen if we go to the Blue Base?" said Tucker

"Don't worry about it Blues, I solved everything!"

Everyone was in the Red Base looking a huge plasma screen and there they could see the interior of the Blue Base. "Sarge, why can we see my Base?" said Church

"Because Church I secretly installed cameras in your base while nobody was looking. Plus Caboose let me in for cookies and tang."

There they saw Naruto taking Hinata's armor off, and man did that took a while. "Man this sucks let see something." said Griff

"Shut up I wana see her boobies!"

"Guys I think we should respect their privacy." Everyone looked at Church as though he was a different person. "What…"

"Hey look at that!" yell Donut

Naruto was able to take off all her armor, but he still had his, all she had was her white bra and panties. "DAAAMMMNNN!" everyone said in union

Naruto groped her breast and she moan satisfying, he then moved his left hand to her panties and rubbed her womanhood making her moan louder. He then went into her panties sticking his finger into her while kissing her neck and rotating her right breast. She moan louder, she place her hand on his hand while message her left breast by herself. He then lick her shoulder and kissed it as well. After a while Hinata started to breath faster and faster. "Naruto! I'm coming!" She screamed as her panties got completely wet. She nearly collapsed but luckily Naruto caught her kissing her forehead. She breathed softly while looking at Naruto lovingly as well did he. He laid her on the ground kissing her, he couldn't have enough of her. He finally stopped kissing and looked at her. "I love so much Hinata." He kissed her lips and she returns the kiss. "I love you too Naruto."

"BOOOO! That's so cheesy, c'mon do her do her do her! FUCK HER!"

"TUCKER SHUT UP! For the love of God this is personal let's forget this and kill each other." Everyone again stared at Church again. "Church do you actually care about someone?" said Tex

"Care, me, yeah right!" Everyone still stared at him. "OH MY GOD I CARE ABOUT HINATA! AND SAKURA! DAMN YOU LITTLE RED BITCH!"

"You suck too Blue." said Sarge

"Not you, my heart!" He then started punching his chest.

Naruto started to take off his armor, Hinata then spotted his mechanical right arm. "Na..Na Naruto? what happen to your right arm?" He looked at his arm. "Oh yeah I forgot about my new arm, well Sarge blew my arm and my face off. So he gave me these…suck don't it."

"This is boring!" shouted Griff

She nodded, she then held his arm and place his hand on her breast. "Can you feel anything with it?"

"Get with the fucking!" said Tucker

"Nah, not really, that's the only thing that sucks about this new arm."

"Narupo you ass!" said Sarge "Griff let me use your body so I can kill Narupo."

"No"

She then kissed his hand and kissed his lips, while kissing her, he used his free hand taking her panty off. He stood up lifting her up while holding legs. He then inserted himself in her as he moved her up and down as they both panted heavily.

"Hold hottie in the air." Tucker took notes as he watched Naruto and Hinata have sex. "This is the most disturbing and most radical thing I ever scene!" said Sarge

"Radical, disturbing what the does that suppose to mean Sir?" said Simmons

"…….What was that Simmons?"

"Never mind Sir."

"Hey lets look at Sasuke and Sakura." said Tucker

He flipped the channel seeing that they were about to get busy. Sakura was already naked as Sasuke took off his armor, then Sakura noticed his arm and leg. "Sasuke what happen to your arm and leg?"

"Sarge, blew them off." He shook off the memory. "He's such an ass sometimes and I wonder why we're still in his group."

"Maybe you should change sides." She kissed his lips and he kissed back.

"Don't do it Sus, or I'll send Griff at you dirt bag!"

Sasuke laid Sakura on the floor as he kissed her neck then her collarbone. She moaned as he message her breasts. She turned her head right to left as she could feel his lips and tongue kissing, biting and licking her breast. She tried to get up as he moved off of her and she started sucking his manhood.

"Daaaaammmmmmnnnnnnn! She got it down! Yeah Bitch suck it!" said Tucker

Everyone looked at him as there was a uncomfortable silence in the room. "Shut up!" everyone shouted

Sasuke groaned as she stoke and suck him up and down. She then licked the head making him groan even louder. She got up as she hover over him, Sasuke led his manhood into her womanhood. Sasuke groan as Sakura scream silently. He then moved her up and down, the feeling was intense as she screamed louder and louder. He then laid her on the ground and laid on top of her and repeated the process.

"You know I never like the missionary position." Said Griff "Shows to much man's ass and no boobies."

"Tell me about it." Said Simmons "But I wonder why the call it the missionary position, isn't that kill the meaning of its real meaning."

"Donut what are you looking at?" said Sarge

"Ooooooohhhh I never knew that Blue Base has such pretty wall paper."

"Donut, what's wrong with you?" said Tucker

While moving in and out Sasuke kissed her neck as she moaned. Soon he spilled his seeds in her. They panted softly as they kissed each other.

All four rested on the wall unknowing that their being watch. "Man, what relief." Everyone agreed with Naruto.

"That's it!" All four jumped by Sarge's voice. "What where's Sarge?!"

"Right here dirt bag." A image appeared on the wall showing most of the Blues and all of the Reds just saw them having sex. "What did you saw everything?!" said Sasuke

"Yup and it was awesome." Said Tucker

"FUCK YOU ALL!!!!!" Said Naruto

At the base of the religious nuts. "RUN AWAY!" Everyone ran around madly when a missile killed one of them. "Who do I care, NO ONE!" He launched another killing another religious nut.

"Church, I think you need to calm down."

"Shut up bitch!" He launched another missile. "Yeah DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!...man this is so boring. I'm going home."

"What a nub."

End Chapter


	16. Chapter 15

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

AI

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 15

_"I am the enemy of your forefathers, the enemy of your enemy, and I have a hostage of your ally. Set me free from your enemy, and you will gain a ally or enemy!"_

Sasuke and Sakura saw Naruto, all the Reds and Blues running at the Red base. "Naruto what's going on?!"

"THAT!" He pointed over a hill and saw the Flood scattering all over the canyon. Multiple Flood Parasites, Carriers, Combat and Pure Form Flood scattered all around the canyon.

"What the hell are they?!" said Sakura

"There Flood…" Tex walked up behind them. "Flood? What the hell is a Flood?" said Sasuke

"Parasites Susu." Sarge and the others arrived in the Red Base.

"It's Sasuke!"

"Alright men this is what where going to do. Simmons get on the turrets and kill Griff"

"Yes sir"

"What hell!" Simmons shot Griff in the head and he fell to the ground, still alive though.

"Blue team where's your tank?"

"Over there…" Caboose pointed seeing that it was being driven by a flood."

"Blue team, give me covering fire while I go blow up your tank."

"What you can't blow up Sheila, she's family." said Church

"Firing main canon" (BOOM) "BLOW UP THAT MOTHERFUCKER SARGE!"

"Sheila!!!" shouted Caboose

"Narupo, Susu…"

"It's Naruto and Sasuke!" they said in union

"I want you two to be bait and lead them away from me, oh and when I mean bait I mean I don't suspect you to survive this, so DON'T SURIVE!" Naruto and Sasuke looked at Sarge blankly.

"That's it! Church we're joining your team." said Naruto

"The hell you will!"

"What, why not?"

"Why not, why not, look at my team, I have an idiot…"

"Hello"

"A pervert!"

"What's up"

"And my bitch of a girlfriend!"

"Bastard"

"What the hell do I need two emo kids?"

"Emo? We're not emo."

"Actually, you two are emo."

"What Tucker…"

"Oh boohoo no one likes me because I have a fox inside of me. So I have to jack off every night while I cry myself to sleeping" Said Tucker

"My Big brother killed my entire family except me because I was too chicken to do anything." Said Church

"Oh, oh I got one, Hinata always loved me, but I haven't notice her for seventeen years until she got huge honkers!"

"That's not true!" said Naruto

"Wait this one is so harsh, I love Sakura but I can't express my feelings because I'm such an ass so I had to jackoff while thinking about her."

"Shut UP!" said Sasuke

"Hey I got one" Then Naruto and Sasuke aimed their weapons at Church and Tucker. "Okay, maybe we went too far."

"…Right Sarge we're back on your team. We'll go and be bait." Naruto whined.

"No Naruto, don't be bait."

"Hey you use my name for once. Then why do I have this uneasy feeling."

"Rather, I want you to get the hell off my BASE! And you TOO Sasuke!"

"What?! But why?!" They said in union

"Why? Why, you two turn your backs on the Red team, why, I know Griff is an idiot but, but good God he'll never turn his back on the Red team."

"Thank you sir." Griff said lying on the ground. "Shut up Griff, were not having a moment." Sarge then hits Griff on the head. "Oww."

"Uh guys." Tex looked over the Flood coming closer and closer. Tex looked over at Sakura and she looked over at the Flood. "Wait Sarge, if were not in the Red team or the Blue team then what team are we in now?" said Naruto

"What are you two talking about," said Simmons "You're in your own team. The dipshit team."

"Dipshit team?" Said Sasuke

"Yeah run by dipshit." Said Donut

Naruto and Sasuke looked at Donut for a while. "Hey Donut want to come over on our team? We have cake." Said Naruto

"No you don't…really?"

"Hey what about you make us a cake."

"Believe me you two," Said Simmons "You don't want him to make a cake." He then remembers Sarge birthday cake. Simmons shivered by the memory.

"Well Sasuke, it's just you and I."

Sasuke stared at Naruto for a while and remember all the times that they were both in a team for a mission. "Oh God I'm going to die."

"Hey don't worry Sasuke, we'll be the best team in the box canyon."

"Yeah, with our superior tactics we'll have two bases in a box canyon. Whoopee fucking doo."

"………Yeah, you're right." Naruto lowered his head in disgrace.

"Besides, we need to find Hinata." Said Sasuke

"Right Hinata! We need to find her too! Yeah!" Naruto ran to the teleport and disappeared. Both teams looked at the idiot and looked at Sasuke. "Is he that stupid?" said Church

"Yeah…better go follow him." Sasuke walked in the teleportal and Sakura followed. "We'll we just lost three soldiers." Said Tucker

"Who cares, they were annoying as hell." Said Griff. "I so wanted to kill those three so much. So good riddance for them."

"You know, while you all talk the Flood are now at the base door step!" shouted Tex

At the Blue base Doc, Sister and Jr. and saw the ships crash and the Flood charging at the Red base. "Oh no the Flood." Said Doc "I don't want to fight the Flood, I'm a pacifist."

"Wow, you're a pacifist? I never knew that. I always thought you were just a pansy."

"Well…?" Out of nowhere Wyoming, Gold and Silver, the ninjas team and the Elites appeared from the teleportal. "Oh dear…" said Wyoming seeing the Flood.

end chapter


	17. Chapter 16

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

AI

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 16

"Alright, men…In order to fight the Flood creatures we must GIVE THEM NO MERCY!" said Sarge "THIS IS SPAR…oh wait, wrong movie, BLOOD GULTCH!!!!! SPARTANS, GIVE THEM NOTHING, BUT TAKE FROM THEM EVERYTING!!!"

"How about no." said Griff

Caboose eyes then started to turn red and started to scream into insanity. **"HAIL MEGATRON!!!" **

Back with Naruto and the others

"_Children of my enemy, why have you come? Do you come for her? Help me and I will receive."_

Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura jumped out of the teleport into an infected area of the Halo. "What the hell?!" Naruto walked on the soft squishing floor and Sasuke and Sakura followed, equally surprise. "What the hell is all this?" While Sakura tread next to Sasuke a door opens by their surprise. They aimed their rifles at the open door and walked in slowly. _"If you want her…"_ They turn left and right looking for who is speaking to them. _"I will lead you to her. But first, defeat the sinners"_

"Sinners?" They all said in union. They walked in the disgusting fleshy halls only to find a dead end. "Dead end."

"_I never wanted this. I never wanted this to happen to her. But to know what he's up to is my mission. My sins have been reflected to what is happening now."_

"Her? Who there, who's her?!" shouted Naruto "Tell me!" He fired his assault rifle in the air. "Naruto, conserve you ammo!" shouted Sasuke. Naruto started to calm down, for now. All thought now his only focus is on Hinata. All he wants is to have her in his arms. Then the floor open and they fell into a vent like area landing in an advance mechanical room that had plasma screens in mid air and sentinels hovering around the air. "What is this place?" said Sakura "Some type of advance technology?"

"Looks like it?" said Sasuke

They moved about in the room without trying to be detected by the sentinels. They wonder if those are the enemies that they have to defeat. Naruto had other thought, he was so blind on helping Hinata he started moving away from Sasuke and Sakura, though they didn't notice him moving away, he reached to a stair way and saw a image of Hinata, wearing her armor walking up in the stairs. "Hinata!" The sentinels reacted to his voice and moved to Naruto's position. Sasuke and Sakura saw them moving towards Naruto and were pissed off of him and themselves on not keeping an eye on him. "Hinata!" He stepped in front of the stair way and the image of Hinata disappeared like a mirage. "No, Hinata!" He yelled in pain by one of the sentinels hitting him in the back. "Damn you!" He fired at them, but it did little good because of their shields. They fired at him again and this time it did him more damage because his shields fell and the next blasts caused him to bleed. "Reacting to the third blast he hid behind a Convenient crate and they hovered over the crate. (BOOM) They all exploded by grenades thrown by Sasuke and Sakura. "Naruto…" Sakura ran to her teammate. Naruto ached in pain, those sentinels blasts did a number on him that it made breathing hard for him. _"Do I know you?"_ That voice sounded just like Hinata. "Hinata?"

"_I think I know you"_ She screamed in horror. _"Please, please don't listen to me, don't look for me. I'm not myself anymore. I'm a being of lies, don't look for me."_

"Hinata..." He took his helmet off and wonders where all these voices are coming from. _"So you are looking for her. We exist together now. Two corpses in one grave."_

"Grave, NO! You bastard!"

"Naruto! Calm down!" Sakura tries to calm him but with no avail. "Sasuke, help me with him." Sasuke knelt next to Naruto and punched him in the face knocking him out. "Did you heard that voice Sakura?"

"Hinata, yeah I heard her." She lowered her head worried about her. "She's…she's already been through so much now, we have to find her. We just have too!"

"Calm down we'll find her."

"I feel, so, helpless Sasuke."

"Me too. I can't imagine what Naruto is going through right now."

Back at the box canyon. The Red team and Blue team defeated the Flood. And when I mean defeated I mean Tex did all the work. And strangely Caboose was able to defeat five tank forms by himself. "Caboose, I never knew that you can handle a rifle like that." Said Church "How the hell did you learn to shoot like that?"

"They remind me of someone…I can't put my finger on it, but I have this hatred for someone and I saw that person in them and I started firing at them." His teammates stared at him worried that he might slight their throat. "Wait I probably know." Said Sarge "Hey Caboose, Narupo and Susu."

"**I will kill you all!"**

"Oh thank God it's not me!" said Church

"Hey since those three are gone, and our only reason that we were working together is because of them, does that mean we're enemies again." Said Simmons

"Yeah I guess so, you know working together might bring us together if—" Sarge then fired at Tucker and he fell in pain. "Son of a bitch!"

"What the hell Sarge! I wasn't done talking!" said Church

"Hahaha, ping!"

"Yeah that's one for Red and zero for Blue!" (Bam) Church killed Simmons. "Son of a bitch!"

"Church killed Simmons, you bastard!" shouted Sarge

Let's fast forward a bit, Church kills Sarge "Son of a bitch.", Donut kills Tucker "Son of a bitch.", Griff kills Donut "Son of a bitch.", Tex kills Griff "Son of a bitch." and Caboose kills both Tex and Church by accident "Son of a bitch." and kills himself by throwing a grenade between his legs like an idiot that he is. "Son of a bitch."

"Where in bloody hell is Blue team?" Wyoming said to Sister

"Uh, well, I think I know." Said Doc pointing at the dead soldiers. "Wow, the Flood killed them." Said Kiba

"No, they actually killed each other, oh boy this is going to take some time."

"Blarg, honk, honk HONK!"

"Hey don't worry, your daddy is alright little dude." Said Sister

"Blarg…blarg…"

"Yeah I know, I feel the same."

"What the hell is that thing?" said Asuma

"Looks like a…grub…" said Gai

"Honk?"

"Oh yeah, it's so a grub." Said Kakashi

"So, what's its name?" said Ino

"_His_ name is Blarggity Blarg-Tucker." Said Doc

They all looked at Doc speechless and their faces looked like saying, who in the right mind would call their kid with that name, especially a grub.

Sasuke, Sakura and Naruto walked in a long purple tunnel having crimson blue stains on the ground and wall. When they approach to the end of the tunnel they could hear fighting in the next room. "What is that noise?" said Sakura

They walk up to the corner closer and then a large alien being land on the ground covered by Flood Parasites. A Brute saw the ninja/Spartan team and charged at them. They quickly dodge the Brute, Naruto landed next to a bunch of crates, that exploded by a Tank Flood. The Tank threw Naruto away from it, killing his shields, and turn into its other form and attack Naruto. He grabbed his rifle firing every bullet it had. The Stalker Flood finally died with only inches to Naruto, unfortunate fate isn't to kind towards him. A Brute Captain grabbed him by the neck and threw him the wall. The Brute charge at him, but then the Flood Parasites covered him killing the Captain and turning him into a Flood. "What the hell is wrong with this place?!" He yelled reloading his rifle, the Brute Flood walk up to him closer, out of nowhere a plasma grenade landed on the Brute Flood head exploding and destroying the Brute. A hand grabbed Naruto by the shoulder throwing him to the side as his savior went back fighting the rest of the Flood and Convenient. Naruto got up from the ground dazed. "Why am I always being thrown?" He said grabbing his rifle. "Naruto!" yelled Sakura running to him along with Sasuke. "Are you alright?"

"Apparently…did anyone see who threw me here?"

"Uh, no we didn't."

The last of the Flood dies by the hand of the worrier, who wielded a plasma sword in his hand and wore strange looking armor. "Uh did you…" He nodded and kept on moving. "Hey thanks…um…hey you're an Elite aren't you!"

"Yes…" He slightly turns answering to Naruto, his voice sounded old and his body looked old too, and moved on to the next room. Naruto got up from the floor and ran to him, followed by Sakura and Sasuke too. "So…um I'm Naruto, what's yours?"

"I am call by my rank, nothing more."

"Ah…" He said without knowing what he meant by that, though this Elite seemed to have a large amount of honor to keep on moving. "So, what do everyone calls you?"

"Arbiter, they call me the Arbiter."

"Arbiter…look…um, we're looking for a friend and I think that you might be able to help us." Arbiter stopped in his tracks and looked at Naruto, which gave him chills and even the Fox, being now a AI, too had chills just by the stare of this alien. "You are a Spartan, am I correct?"

"…Ah…" He remember once calling himself a Spartan, but this question still stumped him not knowing what to answer to the Arbiter. "Yes…I think."

"You think, or you don't know. Which is it?"

"Yeah I'm a Spartan!" Naruto said impatiently.

"I once knew a Spartan, they called him Master Chief, we weren't friends, but in peace I would like to call him one. But that happen to long ago and time has made me old and fragile, but my spirit is still _young_ and _swift_. If this friend of yours is the friend that I once knew then I will help you against the Flood and the Convenient."

"Great, so, do you have any one else backing you up?"

"When someone is declared as the Arbiter he is cursed to live a life of suicidal missions, I told my brothers to leave this sector to me and move to another. I have no one to help me. It seems you three are all I have as help."

All three ninja/Spartans stared at the Arbiter, if they're helmets were off their eyes will be popping out of their sockets. The Arbiter moved on and they all simply kept on staring at him as though he was more superior than they could ever be. "His entire life is nothing but suicidal missions…how sad." Said Sakura wanting to help the Elite.

"It's his life and culture, who are we to judge him."

"Yeah, but it's still not fair Sasuke!" said Naruto also wanting to help the Elite. Sasuke sighed wondering how to get their minds off of the Arbiter's life. "Are you three done reminiscing or shall I continue without your help?" He said in annoyance.

"Sorry Arbiter…" They all said in union and followed the Elite to a room with a strange symbol on the wall. When all three ninjas/Spartans entered with the Arbiter he activated the symbol which the floor turn purple and levitated them like an elevator. "This is an elevator?"

"What else should it be?"

"Arbiter," said Sasuke "What is going on here? Why is all this happening?" The Arbiter looked at the three Spartans as though they were retarded or stupid. "It happen nearly a hundred of years after the war between the humans and the convenient ended. We lived in peace and the lies of the Prophets were finally silence, unfortunate we were wrong. A few High Prophets still survive." All three looked at the Arbiter as though they had no idea what he was talking about. "The Prophet of Patience, Prophet of Peace and Prophet of Virtue the only Prophets that are now living are now the High Prophet of the Convenient and just like his predecessors, Truth Mercy and Regret, they too want to activate Halo and begin the so call 'Great Journey.'"

"Oww! My head!" said Naruto

Back at Blood Gulch

"What the hell?!" All the ninjas yelled in union. "But-but they were all dead?" said Kakashi unsure if Doc was some voodoo doctor or a Satanist. "Oh come on, it's just a simple priseeger that requires patience and really nifty gadgets. Such as this knife this drill this strange looking object that looks like a banana and, oh, this one important, a rubber ducky. Though I don't know how all this makes a great apple pie, but it sure does."

APPLE PIE!!!! I'M TALKING HOW THE HECK YOU BROUGHT THEM BACK FROM THE DEAD!!!???"

"Oh, that one simple too. I just gave them Flintstone vitamins that usually help. Gummy Flintstone vitamins."

"Flint-stone-vi-ta-min-s?

"Congratulation you can speak dumb ass." Kakashi glared at Griff, who was shaking off the uneasy feeling in his head, no one ever talk to him like that and he talk to him like he was trash. "Man what happen? And why do I have the urge to have gummy bears?" said Simmons

"I'm going to go for a walk…because I feel dizzy." Said Caboose

"Uh, Caboose, it's better if you don't move around." But he didn't listen, during his walk he ran into a rock, a tree, a rabbit, a swamp, yes a swamp, a duck, yes the annoying rubber ducky, another tree and finally hole. "I can't feel my legs."

"Ooohhh, great Suzan dumplings, more ninjas!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" Everyone yelled.

"Crap…more annoying people…" Griff looked at the ninjas and looked over at Forge. For a moment he stared at him and the other Gold and Silver soldiers, five minutes pass and Griff finally remembers him. "IT'S FORGE!!!!!! Run away!!!!"

"What Forge! Oh God!" yelled Church

The Reds and Blues ran to the caves firing their weapons violently at anything they stupidly see. Everyone look on as they either tripped shot one another or even jumped around like idiots. Tex stayed behind, thank God, while looking at her ex and comrades run away. "So, you're on our side now?" They all nodded and looked back at the Red and Blue. "Good…living in a box canyon can get to you, you know."

"Yeah, two bases in one box canyon, whoopee fucking do." Said Striker

"Will anybody stop saying that!?" she yelled in anoynace

The elevator finally arrived to its destination and all four got out seeing a large hologram of the Prophet of Patiance doing a sermon. "Krie sha le na— me. Sha no me kau sa—l la me. Alkia si- no se, al yon— no la me."

"What is that guy saying?" Arbiter shushed Naruto and pointed out that there were three Brute Chieftain: one Chieftain Armor and two Chieftain Weapon, along with their packs, consisting of two Ultra Captains, three Captains, six Bodyguards and four Brute Ultra, Major and seven Minors, kneeling to the hologram. "We must move fast, swift and silently. These Brutes will be too much for us if we stay fight, especially with three Chieftains all in one place."

"So how do we evade them all?" Sasuke said while seeing one of the Brutes sniffing the air, the Arbiter look at that Brute closely hoping that he hadn't sniffed them out yet. "We must leave now quickly, but silently." They quickly moved around them without being spotted, though the Brutes aren't a stupid race, they knew someone is in the room and it only made them angry for disrupting the sermon. One of the Weapon Chieftain roared and grabbed his hammer knocking a crate out of his way and Sakura was open to attack. "Sakura!" Sasuke yelled silently, they Chieftain roared for his comrades and they all react. "Sasuke!" All of a sudden the Arbiter attacked the Chieftain killing him with two strikes, his pack roared and tears poured out of their eyes mourning for their Chieftain and attacked the Arbiter in berserk mode. "You will pay for killing my BROTHER!!!" said the Armor Chieftain firing his cannon at the Arbiter, luckily he got Sakura and himself out of the cannon's firing range, and went back fighting against the Brutes. Naruto and Sasuke fired back, but it was difficult because they were more amazed of seeing on how the Arbiter fought. So swiftly and perfectly that it was unrivaled to any fighting style they saw back home, so too the Brutes fought well, but with more rage and aggression than tactical. The two ninja/Spartans got sick and tired of sitting on the sidelines and moved in. They melee a few Brutes and threw a couple of spike, frag and plasma grenades at some Brutes, successfully killing them. The Arbiter didn't pay too much mind on them as he was to busy moving around killing Brute Bodyguards to get to the Brute Chieftains. Naruto, unfortunate, ran into a Brute Chieftain Armor, holding a Fuel Rod Canon. "Crap…" said Naruto knowing that he's dead meat when the Chieftain fired his Fuel Rod Canon. Naruto dodge the attack, but it did damage his shields drastically, and threw a plasma grenade at the Chieftain. The Brute Chieftain grabbed the grenade and was about to throw it back, but it explode killing the Brute Chieftain. Sasuke and Sakura killed the other Chieftain faster than Naruto did and finished off with the other Brutes.

"Man they were difficult." Naruto said exhausted.

"Brutes are known to be fierce worriers just like my kind." Said Arbiter

"Great, we have a new enemy. Those things and the Brutes." Said Sasuke

"Yeah, but that thing, who spoke to us said that he has an enemy and wants it destroyed, but who's that enemy?"

"Thing? What thing?"

"I don't know, it said 'two corpses in one grave' and then he finally stops talking."

"The Gravemind."

"Gravemind?" said Naruto

End Chapter

"What the fuck is a Gravemind?!"

The Brutes and Elites are my favorite species in the Convenient because they have more interesting culture than the other spices, plus they look cool, so I might not include the others that much, except for the Hunters you need those too, but if you want me to put in the story I will.


	18. Chapter 17

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

AI

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 16

"_These are stupid and violent, and are the most foolish."_

"Sarge! How long are we going too hide here?" said Simmons

"When I start giving Griff some respect."

"How long will that take?"

"Not even when I enter into the golden gates."

"Alright, but what if those mercenaries find us?"

"Then we'll use Griff as a shield while we run off in fear and give applauses to the Gold and Silver soldiers for killing Griff."

"Sarge, Sir, how about those new ninjas?" said Donut

"Oh, yeah, ninja…a simple slap in the back of the head will do."

"Or you can use that slushy machine to send them back to their world." Said Griff

"Slushy Machine? Oh yes, slushy, that's a brilliant idea Simmons."

"Simmons?!"

"Thank you sir."

"Alright, first we need to move back to our base and rebuild slushy."

"Hey, what they're talking about?" said Church

"What?" said Tucker

"What are they talking about?"

"Man, we're only five feet away from them are you deaf or retarded?"

"No, Caboose is retarded and as for deaf, possibly."

"Possibly, what do you mean possibly?"

"Remember that time Caboose jammed that pencil into my ear."

"No…"

A couple of weeks ago…

Church enjoyed the morning, as every morning, with blowing or killing something with his rifle. Caboose then ran to the roof of the base shouting like a maniac.

"Caboose, what the hell is wrong with you?!" He shouted aiming his gun at him.

"HAIL LORD MEGATRON!!!!" Caboose ran into every solid material in his way. He then ran up to Church shouting at him. "HAIL LORD MEGATRON AND TOM CRUISE!!!" Which resulted to go deaf, for a few weeks.

"Wait, you said he jammed a pencil in your ear."

"I did…oh right…" Tucker stared at his leader and at Caboose and back at Church. "That was all a lie was it?"

"Yeah…"

While they argue Caboose felt a bit lonely. "I'm so lonely, so lonely, so loooooooonnnnnllleeeeyy. So very lonely, so very, very, looooooooonnnnnllllleeeey."

"Caboose, stop sinning." Shouted Church.

"But I'm lonely."

"Fine, hey Reds, get over here!"

Five seconds later…

"What is it Blue." Said Griff

"Help us tell a story."

"What?" said Simmons

"Oh, oh, oh, tell them the story about the birds and the birds." Said Donut

"Eww gross, not that story and do you mean birds and the bees."

"How about this one." Sarge whisper something to Church and, strangely enough, he agreed with him. "Oh man, this can't be good, a Blue agreeing with a Red." Said Tucker

"You guys aren't serious, are you?" said Griff

"Serious as a mutherfucker, lets begin!" said Church

Enter Sarge… "Once upon a time there where founder guys, two designers, a musician, and a writer and all four were bored of all the shity games that were coming out of the market, because really there all the same shit! So they created their own game, it's about this huge ring in space and these crazy…Mexicans wanting to use the ring to kill everyone in the galaxy because they were allowed to pass through the border, their first attempt was with a giant piñata, but failed because of those damn cavity craving kids. Then there was this crazy black man, yeah, who killed off all the Mexicans until the Asians came flying through the sky using laser beams that were coming out of their hand and eyes for some strange and messed up reason. After that…"

"Asians, Mexicans and Blacks, oh my!" Yelled Caboose

"Sarge! You're telling the wrong story!" Yelled Church. "It's my turn anyway, alright right off where Sarge left off where these guys wanted to make the BEST GAME EVER, they thought about what was going on in the world, with the crazy mad man and his coalition killing hundreds of innocent people dying for no good reason. Well you see Caboose long, long time ago the Jews were upset with this rock and threw it at some guy, he was so angry with the Jews that he made a new country name Germany and after several years later every German citizen forget about the horrendous accident, except for one his name was…Himler."

"You mean Hitler?" said Simmons

"Whatever, back to my…"

"No whatever me, Himler was Hitler's right hand man and even though it was Himler that so many Jews die everyone blamed it on Hitler. So really you got your history wrong Blue, because Hitler hated the Jews and brainwashed everyone hating the Jews."

"This is my story you freaking know it all…"

"Hey I just realize something," said Tucker "from, Who the Grinch stole Christmas, there was a quote saying, 'hating the Who's.' if you say it ten times fast it almost sounds like hating the Jews."

"Tucker, one Dr. Suess was not prejudice against Jews, two you're a fucking dumbass and three where the hell did you got that idea?!"

"What, you like Dr. Suess?"

"Yeah, who doesn't, I think he's a great role model."

"Alright, everyone raise their hand if you like Dr. Suess." Everyone raised their hands except for Tucker. "Oh…"

"Can we get back to the story?!" yelled Sarge

"Let me tell the story." Said Griff "Alright Blue, this is how it went."

"You're a fucking dumbass!" Yelled Sarge

"You see those four guys,"

"Prick!" yelled Simmons

"They wanted to tell and make the best,"

"Fucktard!" Sarge yelled again

"So they got their guys together…"

"Gay, faggot, ass fucker, baby eater!" Simmons again yelled

"And made a game called, Super Mario Brothers."

Everyone just stared blankly at Griff and he wondered why everyone were staring at him. "Griff, that ought to be the most retarded, insensitive, stupidest, gayest, flabagory,"

"Flabagory? What the hell does flabagory means?" said Church

"Grotesque, satanic, evil thing you just told to poor Caboose." Said Sarge "That was not how it went!"

"Oh, oh, oh, can I tell how it went Sarge?" said Donut

"Yeah, sure, just don't do it too girly!"

"Yes sir, okay, this is how it went. There were these guys and they made this awesome merchandise, for little kids. They called it Bratz!"

"Oh god no!" yelled Simmons

"Someone shut him up!" yelled Griff

"You can come their hair, put lips stick on, change their clothes."

"Donut, that must be the gayest thing I ever heard from a man." Said Church

"Yeah, I know, and believe me I got intimate with a Barbie doll once." It was silent in the cave as everyone stared at Tucker, again, for telling a really awful image in their head. "Tucker, never again will you tell that story." Said Church

"Can I tell the story?" said Caboose

"Caboose, can you even tell a story?" said Church

"Sure……what's a story, oh wait I have one now. It's about four people making a big game, with lots of laser battles and earth is more advance and they found a way to travel, laserspeed, oh wait, lightspeed and there are big rings that have the power to end life using a thingy, uh um, the key and these things call us declaimers and only humans can activate these big rings. Because we are related to these more advance other species who like to run a lot, um Forerunners. And this other guy, he was Master of these little people, because he was tall, just like all us. Do you know that we all have the same height as…Master Chief, oh and there was another one who has problems with slashing people with a really fancy sword, just like your Tucker and they call him, uh, Arbiter. Yes Arbiter."

The Reds and the Blues stared at Caboose quite surprise for the stupid and possibly slightly retarded Caboose; seriously the guy has a better vocabulary than most of the shows I see. "Caboose, how do know all this?"

"Oh, uh…lets see…oh yeah."

Fifty weeks ago…

"Sheila, do you know why we're fighting?"

"No, but I think Lopez does."

"Lopez, do you know?"

"Si, voy a empierza cuando la gerra empiezo."

"Man that was one shity story Lopez!" shouted Andy

"…Okay."

Five weeks later

"So, that's why we're fighting huh, and it took me five weeks for me to learn what you were saying in Spanish."

"Caboose," yelled Andy "How about you give me some credit for translating, and why did it take you that fucking long for you to learn why we're fighting. Lopez only took twenty minutes of explanation."

Caboose, being so stupid didn't know what the insane bomb was talking about, due to the fact he was thinking of cookies and orange juice. "Huh, what?"

Forty-five weeks later

"Caboose, how is the enjoyment of eating cookies and drinking orange juice explain that you know the story that we all tried to tell you?"

"Uh……"

"Never mind."

"Alright, we told Caboose a story, now it's our turn. You're going to help us rebuild the slushy machine and send those asstard—"

"Asstard?" said Church

"Back to their world and go back on fighting the war."

"Wait Sarge, let's think about this, and I mean before we send those ninja back to their world. Just five hours ago a ship infested of Flood just came out of nowhere and landed, or crash whatever. All I'm saying, maybe we should asset the situation as thinking why the Flood just suddenly came crash/land here."

"Well, Church has a good point Sarge." Said Simmons. "Those Flood do have the ability to destroy an entire species. Possibly there's a leakage in a one of the gas mines or another ring?"

"How the hell did you know that?" said Griff

"What, that preposterous, Master Chief and the Arbiter defeated the Flood in the Ark, along with the main central conscience of the Flood." No one had any idea what he meant by that until Sarge sighed and gave them the answer. "The Gravemind."

"Oh…"

"Wait, what if there's another Gravemind sir?"

"Griff, for the Flood to make another Gravemind will take years." Said Simmons. "It's a dense alien hybrid compact with multiple sentient life forms. It will take millennium of years for them to make another Gravemind."

"Well, when O'Malley was in my head he did say something about a large talking thingy."

"Wait what, Caboose, what did O'Malley said?"

"Well, uh…I can't remember, hey the big tower…in France." Church sighed. "Well that probably the only lead that we might—"

"Caboose, I'll give you a glass of Orange juice and a dozen cookies if you can remember."

"Cookies! Ah, ah, uh, um…oh yes, now I remember! Um, between the conception and the creation, between the emotion and the response, falls the shadow."

"Oh yeah, that's so something with an advance intelligent mind. Caboose is too stupid enough to even spell Blue."

"This is how I spell it."

Bloo.

"Oh, okay, let's get that slushy working again." Said Sarge "But first, let's make a game plan."

Twelve hours later

"Alright, we all agree that the chicken came first. Right?" said Church

"Yeah."

"Good, now for the plan, Sarge."

"Alright men, this is what we're going to do. We're going to run to the base, but in a straight horizontal line, with the least important one in the begging of the line and the most important at the end of the line. The enemy will be so confused that they'll have no choice but to shoot the first person and the second person in line."

"What, oh not this plan again." Said Tucker remembering the siege of O'Malley's fortress, or in Sarge case The Battle that they nearly got rid of Griff.

"So we all agree that this is a perfect plan." They all stared at him as though he was a bit mad. "Okay, what about this plan, we'll use Griff as a distraction while we move in the base and fix the slushy machine."

"Well that's sounds good." Said Simmons

"Yeah, I'll go with that one." Said Church

"What, hey do I have a say in this?" said Griff

In the depths of Halo in a large cavern somewhere underneath the library, Hinata laid in a coffin stasis of a slimy and gooey material. "Enemy has surrounded all sides; more than grave can contain, I see no further use having you by my side. I'll send you instead of them. Now wake from your dreams, and go on your journey." Hinata slightly twitched and she was released from her coffin. "Rise child of my enemy."

She slowly stood up and her rifle, MA5C, dropped next to her. She picked it up realizing that this isn't the same rifle she had when she was capture. "Hinata, are you alright?"

"Yes, Master Chief, I'm alright, what about you?"

"Don't mind me I'm inside your head remember."

"Right. Why did he let me go?"

"**Enemies have surrounds us all, the old have became anew, and the dead have came back from the grave. I'll send you to the Icon, and you must hold it there."**

"What do you mean, old have became anew and the dead have came back from the grave?" she asked, but he didn't respond. "Chief, do you know?"

"No, but I have a bad feeling. Let's just get the icon and we'll uncover the mystery. Oh one more thing, I'm sorry that I got you in this mess, it's not me sending someone else to do my work."

"It's alright John you're doing your duty, I'm doing mine." Gravemind then teleported her somewhere in Halo.

End of Chapter


	19. Chapter 18

I don't own Naruto or red vs

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

AI

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 17

"_This is one is sloth and…… mostly sloth."_

"Hey you out there!" yelled Griff standing in the middle of the canyon shouting at the top of his lungs at the Gold and Silver, along with everyone else. "Hey, you dick eating, butt swipes!"

"What did he just call us?" said Lee

"I think he was talking to you, Kakashi." said Gai

Kakashi stared in the other direction not listening to Griff or Gai. "Huh, what did you say?"

"Damn you Kakashi!"

Griff sighed and look at the other direction. "Yeah, I'm so going to fucking die."

While Griff distracted the Reds and Blues ran over to Red Base fixing the slushy machine. "Alright, now first we connect the lobster thingy to the horsy thingy by using the whish bone thingy, what fucking plans did you use Sarge?" said Church

"Oh, the same design I have right on the wall." On the wall there was a picture of the inside of a ice cream machine.

"Sarge that's an ice cream machine, and that's not even a right design for an ice cream machine! The cooling is not even in the machine, it's in someone else!"

"Yeah, I will attach it in Simmons, that way he'll be my right hand till death."

"It will be a privilege, sir!"

"What a kiss ass." Yelled Griff. He didn't notice that the others were approaching behind him. "Oh crap, hey guys, hurry!"

"Griff, what are you doing?" said Tex

"What do you think bitch! Oh shit I'm so dead!" Tex sighed calming herself down. "Hey you didn't kill me, bitch, whore, slut, hey you now what I'm going to do to your house I'm going to burn it down!"

"Griff, if you don't shut up I'm going to kill you."

"Yeah right…hey why aren't you trying to kill me?"

"Halleluiah Ben and Jerry, we got it working!" shouted Sarge "Griff get out of the way!" He shot a rocket at Griff blowing him away from everyone. "Oww!"

"That's why, dumbshit!" yelled Tex

He flew away far from the group. Most of the nins were surprise to see that Griff teammate killed him. "I'm not dead."

Back with Naruto and the others. They've just moved into a Flood infested area where the floor, walls and ceiling were cover with Flood. "So, this Gravemind thing, he…it controls all the Flood?" said Naruto

"The Gravemind is the central conscience of all Flood, its very body is made up of bodies of its dead victims."

"Eeww, that's gross." Said Sakura

"Where is this Gravemind?"

"Beneath the Library."

"Library? How do we get to the Library?" The Arbiter opens an automatic door revealing a teleportal. "Through here. We can use this teleport sending us to the nearest temple from there we make our way to the Library." Then the roar of the Flood came from behind, they could see the shadows of the Flood approaching towards them. "We must make haste!" He yelled running into the teleportal and with the others following him.

They arrived in a temple like building where a battle took place. They saw the Arbiter fighting against Brutes, Grunts and Jackals. They join in the fighting against the Brutes, Naruto killed a couple of Brutes, but when he got to the end of the temple he ran into a Weapon Chieftain. "Oh, not this again." He said before the Chieftain swung his hammer at him. Naruto dodged his swing and immediately went from behind and threw a plasma grenade at his back killing the Chieftain. He went for his hammer and killed other Brutes. "Get that damn hammer!" Brute Captain Ultra yelled leading the lesser Brutes and other races. Sasuke and Sakura fired their rifles at the lower ranks, such as Grunts, Jackals and lower ranking Brute officers, while the Arbiter and Naruto went for the higher ranking. Out of nowhere a Covenant ship flew over the temple and dropped two Hunters. They smashed through the wall killing all the Grunts and Jackals, the last remaining Brutes were also killed by them too. Sasuke and Sakura saw them jogging over them firing their fuel rod cannon at them. Sasuke and Sakura easily dodged them and started firing at them. Naruto was about to help them out until the Arbiter stop him pulling him behind the wall. "What the hell Arbiter? Why did you pull me out of the battle?"

"I want to see your compatriots fighting style." The Arbiter over looked the battle while Naruto look on with him holding himself from helping them. The first Hunter fired again another blast and the second follow after. They both dodge the attack, but then the second Hunter attacked Sakura with its shield. She immediately threw a spike grenade and dodges the attack, but the Hunter then swiped horizontally hitting her, luckily her shield protected her from the powerful hit but it also almost drained her shields to nothing. "Oh, no!" The second Hunter fired its fuel canon at her. Her shields protected her but the blast damage her chest and arm. She was then rammed to the wall and her helmet nearly fell off. The Hunter again fired its fuel canon again, Sakura instantly rolled away from the blast. A plasma grenade was in front of her and she picked it up quickly. She ran over the Hunter while it fired its canon and tries to hit her with its shield. She then threw the grenade behind it on its neck exploding on contact. She raised her rifle at it hoping that will kill it, but it didn't. "What?! That should have killed it!!" The Hunter fired its canon again and moved forward while constantly firing its canon at her. She had trouble dodging the blast, but she finally made it behind it and unleashed every bullet on its back side finally killing the Hunter.

Sasuke in the other hand had no trouble with the first Hunter, he immediately analyze the Hunter and found its one weak spot, its back. He moved from behind, while the Hunter fired its fuel canon. He fired a few bullets at its back, but then the Hunter swung its shield from the back nearly hitting Sasuke and fired its fuel canon at him. He was hit by it and it did horribly damage to him, nearly killing his shields. Sasuke regain his senses and executed the same tactics. He went from behind and unloaded on the Hunter's back finally killing it. Sakura walk over to Sasuke with her hand covering her arm. She nearly fell if it weren't for Sasuke catching her. "Sakura, are you alright?"

She nodded removing her helmet. The Arbiter and Naruto approach them, Sasuke scorn at the Arbiter. "Hey why did you pull Naruto back, and why didn't you help us?!"

"You fight efficiently, better than I thought." He looked over the Hunters corpses. "You two should be proud of yourselves. I know only a few of your kind who can fend off a Hunter alone."

"Hunter?" The nin said in union. They look at the Hunters and notice that the Hunter had worm like creatures attach to each other. "We must move I sense more are coming."

After the fight Naruto let the hammer go and changed back to his rifle. "Man that thing was heavy." He said after spotting a carbine rifle. He switched his pistol for it and joins the others. "Hey where did you found that weapon?" said Sakura, Sasuke look at his weapon and spotted the rifle too. "I found it on the ground. I was a bit low on ammo so I switch this for the pistol."

"Enough, we can't waste time with chit chat, get a new weapon and keep moving." Said the Arbiter

They reached to a cavern with a huge hill in it and multiple large boulders in the way. They breached the cavern and entered into a cave which leads to a large fortress. The Arbiter press the pad opening the large doors leading downward to a horrible smell and puke green gas floating in the air. The Arbiter sniffed air smelling the order of death. "The Flood are here."

"The Flood?" Naruto stared into the nothingness only seeing the green vapor in the air. The Arbiter moved forward not wasting time for discussion. The others follow him but a bit cautious of their surrounding. The more they move in the fortress the more they became uneasy of this place and following the Arbiter's lead. When they at their highest level of caution the noise of slamming doors spook them, they immediately turn seeing that the Arbiter closed the door and destroying the panel. "We must let the Flood out, this place must be quarantine." He moved forward and the others just stared at him thinking that he is mad just closing the door behind them. How are they going to get out now and why is he quarantining this place? The surrounding area became more and more organic and Ghosts, Wraiths and covenant weapons became more and more frequent, blood stain every where and corpses of human Elites, Brutes, Grunts, Jackals and Hunters were common now. This made the ninja more and more worried that they might run into a pack of Flood. Without them noticing Flood parasite popped out from the organic landing on the dead corpses.

Naruto heard the noise of something whooshing and saw Flood Parasite attaching themselves to their hosts. "Arbiter!" He yelled. The Arbiter turns seeing the once dead corpses, except Hunters, getting up, swelling and turning into Flood. Neither of the ninja had ever seen something this horrendous, before. The undead parasites charged at them. Human, Elites and Brutes moved like they used to move trying to whip them with their whipping hand. Naruto got hit by one of them. He was push back and his shield nearly went to zero which surprise him on how powerful these Flood are. Sasuke fired his plasma rifle and threw a grenade at one of them, but was still got hit by one of the Flood's whip. Sakura retreated and fired throwing all her grenades at them. She started to panic as parasite Flood came up to her. She fired her weapon at them and at the parasites, but they still came. But then the Arbiter came to her rescue killing all the Floods with his plasma sword. He roared and went into combat yelling with each strike he made with a Flood. Sasuke and Naruto, though badly hurt, ran up to her who is scared half to death by these things.

The Arbiter had killed numerous Floods but more came. Like an endless flood that they are. He retreated to the Spartans/ninja. "Spartans run, now!" He yelled going to the opposite direction where the Flood were coming from. They followed the Elite, but the deeper they went into the fortress the more Flood appear. They jump from holes underneath them or above them. Explosion was everywhere as more and more Flood jump out. When they were near to a Carrier Flood it will fall exploding sending five or six parasites at them. Tanks and Scouts were just chasing them. Snipers, annoying of the parasite group, fired long deadly spikes from their back.

The Arbiter will stop at times killing as many as he can but they still came. Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura were running out of ammo and now with no grenades. When enough Flood died they would retreat and attack when there were too many and retreat again. "Why did we follow this guy?" said Sasuke annoyed that they might die for nothing. Then five Tanks appear in front of them. The Arbiter and the others stop running and prepare to attack them. "Do not shot, but listen. Let me lead you safely to our foe."

"What nonsense are you speaking of, parasites?" said the Arbiter "You are our enemy!"

"You shall know soon, or, willing to be food?" They turn seeing the other Parasites coming closer and closer. "Right, we'll follow." Said Naruto. The Tank Flood went in front of them fighting the other Floods. The small group ran off seeing a blue circle in the middle of a room. "Go into the light."

The follow the Gravemind's orders and gathered in the elevator sending them down, very, very down. The ride seems to take at least twelve minutes. When finally they arrived at a uncontaminated area. They enter in the room right in front of them seeing in there a huge pile of organic Flood parasite engulfing a nearly destroyed Spartan suit. "Is that…" then a hidden laser blaster fired at them, they took cover behind a corner of the room. A sinister laughter came from the suit, laughter like they've never heard before. "The darkness wills swallow you whole! Ha! Oblivion is at hand which taste like red bull, which is disgusting."

"Who is that?!" Naruto examined the suit seeing nothing similar to it. "Red soldiers, and one green soldier. Blue soldier. How annoying."

"Hey, he knows about Red and Blue." Said Sakura

Sasuke went out to the open firing his rifle at one of the turrets firing at them destroying it. "I will end your life!" They all open fired at the pile of organic Flood hurting him. The Arbiter roar and ran at the Spartan suit jumping and running up to the suit slicing its head off. "I am Omega! True ruler of the Universe!" He yelled when his head fell. The organic took form of a long whip throwing itself at Omega's head. "Spartan!" Naruto jump out throwing his last grenade at the head blowing Omega's head off. The pile of Flood organ fell apart killing the pile of organic Flood. Naruto and the others glanced at the Spartan head seeing it's a mechanical head. The Arbiter grabbed the Spartan suit and look behind its head seeing an empty slot.

"Something's wrong." The Flood Tank treads up behind them and the Arbiter quickly stood up and growled at the Flood Tank.

"Aren't they on our side?" said Naruto

The ground shook and dozen of tentacles shot out from the ground grabbing the Elite and the ninjas dragging them down into the abyss.

Church saw Tex who is in the way of Srage insane ice cream, slushy machine. He sighed and turns his COM on. "Tex…this is Church…" Out of nowhere he felt something strange like something just nailed into his head. "What, what was that? Ah, forget it Tex…"

"What?! What is it?!"

"Get out of the way, where sending those mother fucking bastards to their own damn fucking piece of shit from a monkey world!"

"You know, you could have just said their world. That is more simplistic than what you just said"

"Well, yeah it's simplistic, but I like my way better, now get out of the way."

She sighed. "Doc, Sister go back to Red Base." She said in her com.

"What, what about Griff?" said Doc

"What about him? The man survives more near death experience than I have." Said Tex

"Wait, what about Wymoning and the others?"

"Tell them to go back to Red base, too."

"Okay, Sister, everyone else let's go to Red Base."

"Yeah! Let's start this ice cream machine!" Yelled Sarge. He activates his machine by pulling the lever and ice cream falling down on the ground making a mess. "Sir, are you sure that's how it works?"

"Of course!" Then the ice cream machine shot out a beam from the top. Simmons, Tucker, Caboose and Donut ran outside seeing what Sarge has just created. Church, Doc, Sister and Tex just stare into space wondering what Sarge have just created.

"Sarge-made- A FUCKING BIG ASS ICE CREAM CONE!!" Church yelled at the huge ice cream cone hologram in the sky. If you can see this cone it is so big you swear it can swallow the earth itself. The others saw the giant ice cream cone in the sky and their mouths went all the way down, but thanks to their helmets it kept their mouths from dropping.

"Who created that thing?!" Yelled Kakashi

"Alright now to send them back!" He pull another level spilling chocolate ice cream to the ground. The FUCKING BIG ASS ICE CREAM CONE then disappeared and a poodle replaced the cone. "Sarge, what the hell are you doing?! Now you created a pansy ass dog?"

"Oh, wait wrong lever." He pulled the strawberry lever and finally a vortex opening into Naruto's world. The Reds and Blue look upon the splendid feudal like world the ninja live in, awe at its magnificent and beauty.

"That…world…is a piece of shit!" said Griff

"Yeah, who would want to live in a world like that, look at it, its realistic and boring." Said Tucker

"Oh, look at my world, So says Narupo idiotically, we live in constant danger and war is always in the horizon and it's a miracle that everyone is such a douche to one another." Said Simmons

"You mean it's not a miracle that everyone is such a douche to one another, right Simmons?" said Griff

"No, I really mean that it is a miracle that they are complete douches to one another and still live in a world that seems so pathetic as that, which I might add is also a miracle that President George Bush hasn't ruined the world even worse, so I add that this world is so bad I bet the Taliban will so want to nuke that world ten times as more than they do with the United States of America. Again I might add that if I were to force my self living in that world I would so kill myself and everyone else near to me!"

Griff just stare at his teammate Simmons and ponder if he had lost his sanity a few days ago.

"Well, let me add to your suggestion Simmons. I know that, that world hadn't been ruined by President George Bush because I bet he had already ruined it and I add even more because that world has constant war and hate for one another I'm not to surprise that their domestic policies is so horrible that it's another miracle that they haven't gone bankrupt, and I add some more, our American system has already lost so much money its another miracle that America hasn't been disbanded as a nation or even torn by civil war because of the horrible economic problems we have and the high cost of gasoline."

Now Tucker is just staring at the two Reds and pondered what Griff was pondering about Simmons, before going on economic problems, and wonder if they both have lost their sanity.

"You really hate Naruto and the world he came from don't you, Reds."

"Oh yes we do." They both said in unison

"Alright you stupid ninja! Get back into your world and stay there!" shouted Sarge at them where they already have enter into their world and Sarge just stare into space realizing that he was shouting to the air. "Well, shit." He went back down and pulled the strawberry lever closing the portal.

"Finally their all gone." Then a rumbling came from the middle of the canyon and three long tentacles blasted out of the floor one grabbing Church lifting him up to the air and the Gravemind summoned himself from the floor growling at him.

"Church!" Yelled Tex and Caboose

"**I am a monument to all your sins. Now the end has come to you and I will seek the other. We will exits as one, two corpses in one grave."**

"Oh…" said Simmons

"My…" said Griff

"Fucking…" said Tucker

"God!" said Sarge

"The Gravemind!" shouted Church struggling in its grasp.

"AH! We're all going to die!" said Donut

The Gravemind huffed and lifted Church up to its face. **"This one is full of anger and hate, and is the more cynical one."**

"Yeah, that probably sounds like me."

End Chapter

"…Fuck…"


	20. Chapter 19 I think?

I don't own Naruto or red vs

I don't own Naruto or red vs. blue

Talking

_Thinking_

AI

Red vs. Blue vs. Naruto

Chapter 18

"_One who bares the one we hate, do you not know why you are here? I shall send you instead of them, find me the key and you will be free."_

Hinata, along with the Chief, was teleported inside the Library just below the icon. In the next room was a hologram of the Prophet of Patience, he wore gold robes and wore the same headdress as Mercy did. "Another Prophet, but I thought they all died with High Charity?"

"Prophet? High Charity? What are they?"

"High Charity, holy city of the Covenant and Prophets, leaders and head of the Covenant state and religion."

While she observed voices came from the hall ways and she hid behind a column. Five Brute Bodyguards and twelve Brute Minors walked from the hall way carrying Brute Shots and Covenant blasters. "I heard something up here." Said one of the Body Guard Brute. He commanded the Minors to search around while they go back and protect the Prophet of Patience. The Brute Minors slowly walk around looking every corner and every shadowy areas of the room. Hinata was able to move around, due to her ninja training, she is able to move around the Brutes without any of them noticing her.

"Hinata, can you get into the elevator?" She nodded and made her way to the elevator. Her white snowy armor gave her more trouble because it won't match to the darkness of the corners, but being Brute Minors, the lowest rank in Brute military, she's able to even evade them without them noticing. She was just about to make it to the elevator. "Have you…" said a Brute Jumper and five jumpers were behind him. They spotted Hinata making her way to the elevator and she spot them spotting her.

"Uh oh…" she said scared

"DEMON!!" The Brute Jumper pointed at her and roared. The Brute Minors all turn and spot her and roared for making fools out of them. "Kill the demon!" said one of the Minors

She ran to the elevator and sent her all the way down to the next room. When the Brutes all got on the elevator it didn't even budge for them. "The Demon is going to possess the Sacred Icon. Quickly to the next level!"

Hinata made all the way down and what she saw made her eyes sparkle and her mouth dropped down. The room is beautiful decorated with the most advance architecture, and in the middle of the room was an item floating over an energy field. She finally landed and was just about to make her way to the icon. "A Reclaimer? Splendid, we have much work to do!" She turns and saw a giant orb with a big eye floating down next to her. "I am 49 Conundrum Penance of Installation 03 it's a pleasure to meet you."

"Ah, it's a pleasure to meet you too…" She said unsure of what he meant by Reclaimer.

"Hinata, don't trust that Artificial Intelligence monitor, all he'll do is delude you."

"O-okay…" She saw Conundrum Penance hovering over to the icon. "Now that you are here I must ask you to use the key to activate the rings. I, sadly enough, am not aloud to do such a task as activating the rings."

"Activating the rings? What will happen if the rings are activate?"

"When the rings are activated the Flood will be defeated."

"Don't listen to him Hinata. If you activate the rings any and all sentient life will die. That includes you and all your friends." She went cold and muttered something that Chief couldn't hear what she was trying to say.

"You're lying to me!" She raised her blaster at Penance and he flew off scared. "What is the meaning of this? I was instructed by your Forefathers, my creators, to activate the rings if the Flood ever released from their captivity!"

"My-my Forefathers?" She shook her head of questions and aimed her weapon at Penance. Behind her the Brutes walked in the room and saw Hinata threatening the so call 'Oracle.'

"The Oracle is in trouble!" The Jumper Brutes attack jumping into the air and using the boosters flew into the air and landing almost close to her. Hinata saw them enter and saw the Jumper Brutes flutter next to her she retreated firing her rifle killing one of the Brutes. The Jumper Brutes fired their Brutes shots and she became overwhelm by the odds.

"Mind if I take over?" said the Chief

She nodded and Master Chief took control of her body.

"I'm back." Said the Chief. The Master Chief went to the offensive quickly and went around them like they were nothing. She saw how Chief fought and maneuver around the Brutes. It was amazing how he's able to control her body and easily kill the Brutes using their weaponry and Spike Grenades. He went over to the Minors and they stood their place, but they were no match for the Chief and easily killed all twelve Brutes.

"That was amazing Master Chief." He nodded and return to his place and Hinata regain her body.

"Hinata, the Icon."

She nodded and walked over to the platform and the holder Index released the Index for her to have. She took it and held it in her hand and saw how beautiful it look, bright green and oddly enough it look like a bone to her.

"Wonderful," said Penance "I will take that." He zapped it out of her hand and store it in his memory hard drive. "Now we must—" But then he disappeared and so did Hinata. Then they reappear back in the grasp of the Gravemind tentacles. She looked around and saw Naruto and the others there.

"Naruto!" she yelled happily

"Hinata!" He yelled her name when he spotted her. He reached out his hand to her, but they were to far away from each other. The Chief spotted an old version of the Arbiter struggling to get free from the parasite Gravemind.

"Arbiter?" he said quietly

"Hey let go!" They looked up and saw Church, Sarge and Tex in the grasp of the Gravemind.

"How in God's name did I got into this situation?" Sarge yelled and saw Naruto and the other. "Ooohh, not you guys." He then saw Hinata and didn't recognized her.

"Church, who's in the white armor?" Sarge yelled at him.

"That's Hinata, right?" she nodded "Right, I haven't seen you for a long time—so—I think she's cool Sarge."

"Erg, I hate ninjas. Holy shit!" The Gravemind emerge from the darkness frightening Sakura, giving Naruto and Sasuke the most uncomfortable silence ever and the Arbiter, the Arbiter didn't forget about him.

"Parasite." The Arbiter sneer at the Gravemind.

The Gravemind look over the Spartans, ninjas and Elite and began with Naruto.

"**This one is foolish and dimwitted, and has a mind of false dreams."**

"What you say!" He yelled almost felt that this thing was making fun of him.

"**This one is full of anger and hate, and is blind to what he posses."**

"What does that mean?" said Sasuke

"**This one is bratty and childish, and has a mind of foolishness."**

"Hey! Don't call me a child or foolish!" yelled Sakura

"**This one has two minds in one body, one kind and other wrath."**

Hinata look at the Gravemind in silence and remember the last time when she met it.

"**This one is full of pride and delusions, and wants to kill the sloth."**

"You mean Griff, when I am going to kill Griff?"

"**This one is a greedy and hate, and has its mind on fortune."**

"You're talking about money, just give the word and I'll kill all them for money." They all stared at Tex and hoped that the Gravemind didn't really have any money.

"**This one is but hate and anger, and is fill with more anger."**

"Wow, you're the only one who gets me big guy." Said Church

He looked at the Arbiter and remembered him from their last meeting.

"**This one is but flesh and faith and is the more deluded."**

"Kill me or release me parasite, but do not waste my time with talk."

"**There is much talk and I have listen threw rock and metal and time. Now I shall talk and you will listen."** He pulled Church up to him and huffed.

"Oh shit he's going to eat me."

"**This one has something in him that does no belong to him, but rather to her." **He looked at Tex and she looked back.

"What do you mean?"

"**I will show you in due time, but now we must discuss the matter of the key." **Penance was in the clutches of the Gravemind and tried to set himself free from its grasp.

"Oh my, so many Reclaimers in one place, how splendid! We must act fast before this infestation becomes too hazardous to contain!"

The Gravemind raised another, the Arbiter and the Chief reconginze the other and they sneer at him.

"I-I am the Prophet of Truth Council, of the most High-high arch of the Covenant."

"A meddler, how an intrusion you are—Reclaimers we must make haste, we must activate the rings!"

"No!" Yelled Truth "To the Ark, I shall become God!"

"There is no reason for us to change our destination to the Ark. We must contain the Flood before they…"

"By Gods, by the RINGS! My successors will continue the Great Journey and I'll make sure that you, Oracle, will be eradicated!"

"This one Great Journey," The Gravemind growled. "And this one containment are the same."

"We know of this!" Yelled the Arbiter. "Now, tell us why you brought us here Parasite so I may thrust my blade into you."

"The Alien is a badass." Church whisper to Sarge.

"**There are two, I fear, will engage their common enemy, you and I. Separate we are weak, but united will triumph. I will send you three to one place,"** He said to the Arbiter, Hinata and The Chief. **"And I will you to another. Faith had us brought as foes, but this ring will make us brothers."** With that the Gravemind send them to their coordinates. Hinata and Naruto barely had a chance to even utter a word to each other and they disappeared by the rings transportation.

"So, how did we arrive here again?" said Griff hiding in a close dark room with only a open bar ceiling and the cracks of the door showing little light. In the room had nothing but crates but they, the Blues and Reds, made good use for them.

"Stop whining, Griff." Said Simmons

"I'm as confused as hell too, how did we get here?" said Tucker

"I know!" said Donut

This is what he's thinking of. The Reds, the Blues, the Gold and Silver, Doc, The Gravemind and his Flood army, Elites including the Arbiter, Brutes, Grunts, Jackals, Hunters, Prophets and the ninjas all together in Blood Gulch.

"Alright lets begin…" They started to sing and dance. "I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world Life in plastic, it's fantastic! You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere Imagination, life is your creation Come on Barbie, let's go party!

I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world Life in plastic, it's fantastic! You can brush my hair, undress me everywhere Imagination, life is your creation

I'm a blond bimbo girl, in the fantasy world Dress me up, make it tight, I'm your dolly You're my doll, rock'n'roll, feel the glamour in pink, kiss me here, touch me there, hanky panky... You can touch, you can play, if you say: "I'm always yours""

Donut was still thinking humming to himself, when he began thinking of this the others took their distance from him and had their discussion another place in the small room which was difficult because its so small.

"That will never leave my head!" yelled Griff

"My turn, this what happen." Said Tucker

"Oh no, it's the Gravemind!" yelled Caboose

"Don't worry fellow soldier, I will fend off the Gravemind, for chicks, Bow Chika Bow Wow." Said Tucker in a more fancier and brighter armor that made Caboose eyes bleed and blind.

"Oh Tucker we love you so much and your bright shiny armor and the fact you will sleep with any one of us!" said Tex

"Get away bitch," Sister whacked Tex in the back of her head. "If Tucker is going to have sex with anyone it's going to be me!"

"Hell no!" Tex and Sister started to fight, ripping their armor showing their almost nude bodies. Then out of nowhere, and strangely, a rain cloud poured hot water on them and they stopped fighting and started rubbing their body on each other acting all sexy like. At the end they kissed using their tongues and at that point they became lesbians.

"Bow Chika Bow Wow!" Yelled Tucker

"Oh no, it's the Gravemind!" yelled Griff

"No, it can't be and I never told you I love you Griff." Said Simmons

"Really, I love you too!" That part will be censored for safety reasons.

"I just knew it!" Simmons and Griff whacked Tucker behind the head and kept on whacking him even though he's on the ground.

"That not what happen. My turn!" Yelled Simmons

"Oh no, it's the Gravemind" yelled Caboose

"Caboose, get out of the way!" yelled Simmons "For our glorious Red Sergeant will save the day!"

"Hell yeah, I will!" said Sarge

"Sarge, please spare me!" yelled Griff "I know I'm lazy, useless, pathetic, and imbecile and I know that I don't fit in your image of a perfect soldier, but please have mercy on me!"

"Never Griff." Sarge changed his weapon to a rocket launcher and fired at Griff killing him. "Now for you Gravemind"

"At last, we can see the Glorious Red Leader, Sarge, fight the monstrous parasite the Gravemind." Said Simmons

"It's your time, Gravemind!"

"**Never, for I am the Gravemind!"**

"So be it!" Sarge pressed a button his chest and he grew thirty stories tall. "At the end of this day One shall stand…One shall fall!"

"Whoa, Whoa, Whoa!" Yelled Griff, "That did not happen, and Sarge isn't Optimus Prime. Besides no one is as bad ass as Optimus Prime. This, what happen."

"Oh no, it's the Gravemind!" yelled Caboose

"Simmons! To the Puma!" yelled Griff

"No, no puedo. Los Flood haceron dano a mis pies!"

"Then do something oh wise and all knowing Griff." Said Sarge hiding in the Red Base with Doc.

Griff sighed. "It's all up to me, huh. Blues lock and load! We're brining hell to the Flood!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! That didn't happen, either! And for the last time I'm Dutch-Irish!" yelled Simmons

"Can I have my chance?" said Caboose

"Sure." They all said, exception for Donut who was still singing.

Caboose cleared his voice. "Now this, what _really _happen."

"Oh no, it's the Gravemind!" Yelled Caboose

"**Do not make hurry, for I came for one all knowing and genius sentient being. The Caboose!"**

"The Gravemind wants The Caboose! Why?" said Simmons in how Caboose sees him which his name, to Caboose, is Simon.

"I'm so scare of the Gravemind, but the Caboose scares me even more," said Lt. Chocolate Cake, mental image of Donut with a female voice instead of male.

"The Caboose is going to make battle with the Gravemind!" said Gruff, Griff in how Caboose sees him.

"I'm stupid Private Tucker, and I like to smell butts. Today I'm going to smell the butt of the Gravemind, if I can, that is." Out of nowhere an ominous crowd laughter came from nowhere and the Reds and Blues switch back and forth unknowing where the laughter came from.

"Mr. Church, do not worry, for I will save you." Said Caboose

"Yay," Church, wearing yellow armor, said in a bored tone. "I'm going to be save by the Caboose. I wonder how he will do it. Oh wait I know how. First he will save me, Church's twin brother, Sister, even though I am Church, but that, and most of what is going on right now doesn't make sense, then he will kick the Gravemind's butt with a volleyball and use the hadouken and destroy the evil satellite that is controlling all the jelly bean people and set them free and with the help of the ruby ducky will quack at it like Godzilla."

"Duh hahahaha, I'm so stupid…Believe IT!" said Nukonuko, mental image of Naruto

"I'm a emo! EMO BOY! EMO BOY!" said Salsa, mental image of Sasuke

"I'm such a slut. I want to suck and get fucked by all the guys and drink some pussies." Said Pink flower thing, mental image of Sakura

Hinata, even though invisible, stood in the middle of the gulch and looked around the gulch. "I believe…Caboose has no idea that I even exist."

"Wait!" yelled Tucker "That's wrong in eleven to thirteen ways!"

"Caboose, did mommy love you too much or did she punish you too much?" said Simmons

"Wait, did someone hear something outside?" said Griff

End Chapter

"I'm a Barbie Girl in a Barbie's world."

"Shut up Donut!"


End file.
